New Flowers on the Grave
by Bob Stage
Summary: Alice Kinnian has been haunted by her memories of Charlie Gordon. Now her teenage son William is curious about this person she never talks about. Please R&R. I'd love to hear opinions of this tale.
1. Prologue

**New Flowers on the Grave**

I do not own the marvelous book "Flowers for Algernon"

**_Prologue_**

The greatest possession that William Kinnian had in the whole wide world was his lucky rabbit's foot.

It was something he'd fought with his class mates over, and it was something he'd hold onto until the day he was laid to rest as far as he was concerned.

His mother had asked him why he valued it so. She was not angry with him, but could not understand the childlike attachment he had towards it. Well, she did, but tried to keep the reason out of her head. It hurt her to think about it, and so it was difficult to get any answers from her.

"The last time I saw him,' She had said, 'I ran from the room in tears. I never told him about it."

William was astonished and intrigued at the time. What had possibly happened to drive them away from each other? What had happened in their relationship that broke them apart? He knew very little about the story of his mother's life. She guarded it like an elixir of life. Not even her son could penetrate through the protective shell she had set up for herself.

William wondered why she was so secretive. What had he been like? How had they met?

This had been going on for William's whole life. He had badgered his mother with questions, and she would either evade giving answers, she would give vague responses if pressed, and sometimes began to cry, which ended all persistence in William. He hated to see his mother cry, and she mostly did when he asked her about that part of her past.

She would ask him at times, "Why can't you just live your life and move on? Why are you so concerned with it?" William would stubbornly claim he had a right to know.

Of course, William thought too much about it. It was almost an obsession in his life. He had few really close friends at school, and his grades ranged from brilliant to downright failure. He was troublesome in some classes, commended in others. Teachers were puzzled by this seventeen-year old, and girls were either turned off or intrigued. William didn't seem to notice the attention he got from people most of the time.

His mother worked at a school for people with a disability. She taught a variety of people and was adored by her 'students'. She had a patient air about her, something welcoming and warm in her attitude. William had been in her class enough times to know that they were genuine feelings.

But there were times when she grew cold, even in the classroom. It was little things. Maybe if someone shouted out her name in a certain way, or if someone started talking about a certain topic, she would pause, and the hand of the past seemed to touch her in the class. Of course, she would normally recover instantly, but he had once seen her remain still for a full half minute before answering.

Now it was summer time, and when you live in New York City, that gives someone a lot of different things to do. And for William, it was a great time. He was six months away from his eighteenth birthday, and would be starting Grade 12 at high school. He would get on the bus with his friends and spend the afternoon at the pool, the library, the cinema, wherever they felt like going. He had dated girls once or twice, but the relationships never took flight from the first date. One girl had accused him of being too absorbed, and he had found that was partly true.

He loved to go to the movies. He loved to read books, and he had decided from an early age that he wanted to learn more languages. He studied the French language for a long time, then, when he was just entering high school, he heard of an after-school program teaching Mandarin. He knew about Chinese history and had been fascinated by the Chinese languages. He had chosen to learn Mandarin, and had been willing to throw away class time to get it right. It was easy to practice the language in New York: the variety of people allowed him to hear Mandarin spoken and get as used to the language as French.

Of course, languages didn't help him in mathematics or science. He failed miserably in those classes before. Teachers would sometimes complain of him being unable to sit still and would fidget. William knew he did, but he got bored easily in those classes, and he couldn't help but zone out of what was being discussed.

While the teacher would speak of cosine and sine laws or the difference between a quadratic and cubic function, William had different things on his mind. He was fascinated by the story of Charlie, the man that his mother had known for some time, but then had never seen again. He did not know why, but he knew for sure of one thing. It was the reason that he kept Charlie's lucky rabbit's foot with him.

It was because Charlie Gordon was his father.


	2. Chapter 1

**1**

William had arranged a trip to the movies that day with his friend, Alex. Alex was a slender young man, bred out of dark Italian blood and the hearty Saxon build of his parents. His nose was slightly hooked, with dark brown wavy hair that was usually combed and oiled to match Al Pacino's look in _The Godfather_. His eyes were a pale green, which contrasted with his slightly tanned face.

William knew that Alex was the better looking of the two of them. His skin was paler, and his hair was thicker and blacker than Alex', and he had a slightly shorter and stocky build as opposed to Alex, who was over a foot taller than William. It was funny, though, that Alex was the perfect blend of all the stereotypical images that a German and an Italian were meant to have.

Alex and William loved to go to the movies. They would spend a lot of time talking about the latest films, which were better, or which would win more Oscars. Alex was a major fan of Rock Hudson, and he always maintained that had James Dean not been in "Giant", Hudson would have won. They had gone to see his horror movie "Embryo", directed by Ralph Nelson, and Alex had been stunned when neither Hudson or Nelson received Golden Globes for their work. William had personally hated the film, thinking that it was a miracle that Ralph Nelson continued to have a career.

William didn't feel like going to see a movie this particular day, however. He sometimes had headaches that only got worse in a cinema. No aspirin or pain killer seemed to get rid of them, so he just tried to ignore them and distract himself.

So he and Alex headed over to their favourite hangout aside from the cinema. That place was without a doubt the diner called _Big Bob's Cookout. _It was a diner that had been standing since the 50's and had somehow kept its name in all those years. Based on the old photos it kept on the walls, the cafe had grown considerably with a lot of great new additions. A bigger kitchen, more space to sit, the usual stuff that shows business was steady and plentiful.

The original owner, who had given his name and size to the cafe, had retired a while ago, and had left the cafe to his son Eddie Henderson. Like his father had done, Eddie employed his children in the cafe in the hopes that they would either inherit the place, or would earn the money to go to college. Eddie was in his middle age, with two sons Brendan and Frank. Frank was twenty-three, and was working part time at the cafe while he attended Brooklyn College. Brendan was one of William's close friends: he often worked in the kitchen, where his father taught him how to make the best steaks around. William knew that they were the best steaks because he'd sampled some at a bunch of other places and knew there was none better than _Big Bob's Cookout_.

That day, William and Alex headed for the diner. William had told his mom that he wouldn't be home for dinner; he did this at least once a week.

When the two of them entered the diner, Eddie Henderson was behind the counter, as well as two waitresses in their teens. Business looked good that night, so Alex and William sat up at the counter.

Eddie peered at them, and spoke to them in a thick Brooklyn accent, "Well, if it ain't you two. What's going on?"

"Nothing, Ed." William had been here so often that he was quite comfortable calling the owner by his first name. Alex was more formal, given that he wouldn't have known about this place if not through William.

Brendan suddenly poked his head through the kitchen door, "What'll it be, Will? Alex?"

Alex glanced at the menu lazily, "How about chicken with fries, and a Coke."

Brendan frowned as though he was used to this sort of thing, "Specific? What kind of chicken? Roast? Wings? Tenders?"

"Roast."

Brendan turned to William, "You?"

William smiled, "That special steak with my name on it." He was talking about the fact that their steaks were carefully trimmed of fat and gristle, which was something many diners didn't bother to do right.

Brendan raised an eyebrow, "Anything to drink?"

"Yeah, I'll take Alex' Coke."

Brendan grinned and went to make the food.

Eddie leaned over the counter, "So what'll it be for tonight, boys? Another movie?"

William shook his head, "Bowling alley."

Eventually the food came and they tucked in hungrily. William hadn't eaten much for hours, and was in a ravenous mood.

Brendan came out of the kitchen to lean on the counter just as another employee took his place, "So what kept you from the movies?"

"Headache again,' William muttered through a mouthful of meat. Brendan nodded sympathetically; he knew about the occaisional pains his friend went through.

Suddenly, Alex poked William in the ribs, "Don't look now, but there's two girls eyeing us."

William waited ten seconds before glancing. Two teenage girls, one a curly haired blonde, the other a sleek brunette, were talking to each other, taking turns to give Alex and William rapid glances.

Brendan grinned, "I don't know about you, but my headache's starting to clear up!"

William gave a nod of his head, "Well, I doubt you two would want me around now. I'll do something else."

The others glanced at him sharply, "What?"

William shrugged, "I'm not interested."

Alex raised an eyebrow, "Are you okay? I thought you said there hadn't been anything between you and Samantha." Samantha had been the last date William had had; almost three months ago.

Brendan patted his friend's shoulder, "And even then, you're coming with us, man. We couldn't leave you out."

William sighed, "I doubt I'd fit in. And they might not want to go bowling anyway."

Alex made one last look at the two girls, and turned on his stool so that his back was to them, "Well I'm not leaving you behind. If that's how you feel, then that's that."

Brendan took off his cook's apron, "Let's get going once you two are finished."

The three of them headed to the bowling alley, which was only two blocks away. There were three pool tables, some arcade games, and the usual bowling tracks.

Brendan usually took this time to brag that he could beat them any time at pool, which made Alex always challenge him to a game, with William taking on the winner.

William took a seat near the table, watching the black eight ball whizzing across the green surface like a torpedo, slamming the other balls around the table. Alex would swear foully when he missed, and Brendan would laugh loudly, prompting Alex to curse at Brendan, who would continue to laugh.

William suddenly thought about the two girls at the diner and sighed. Every time he had gone out on a date, it had felt more awkward than the last. The date with Samantha had gone wrong quickly, and William had ended it quickly. He didn't know what was wrong with him, but he felt slightly intimidated by girls. They seemed to have something secret that they could always use against him, and arguing only made it worse. Whenever he'd argued with a girl, he felt at a total disadvantage, intimidated by her for some reason. He didn't understand it- he wasn't a homosexual, yet he could not help but feel the way he had felt. It seemed to get worse the more he had gone out with girls, because it certainly hadn't been as bad in the beginning.

His thoughts were interrupted by a yell of laughter. Brendan had won, and Alex was foully swearing as he passed the pool stick to William, "Kick his fucking ass, Will. Please."

William grinned, and spoke in a mock Italian accent, "Come now, Alexandros, we're not _animales. _This is America!"

Alex aimed a swing for William's head, though half-heartedly. Will ducked him and went for the table. Alex grinned good-naturedly, "Maybe that rabbit's foot will help you for once!"

William stopped dead, and all the thoughts that sprung from a mention of his rabbit's foot flooded his brain. Hastily repressing them, William aimed the eight ball towards the nearest ball. Now was not the time to dwell on his father.


	3. Chapter 2

**2**

"I tell you, Oliver Stone is gonna have a career,' Brendan claimed as they headed out of the bowling alley.

Alex frowned, "What the hell has he done?"

"He won an Oscar for Midnight Express,' William spoke up. He had watched that film, and thought Stone had deserved a writing Oscar for that film. It had been a well made film, and William was interested to see what would come next from Stone.

Alex snorted, "That guy's got nothing on Marty Scorsese. "Mean Streets" anyone? "Taxi Driver"! Jesus, the guy's gonna be a superstar!"

Brendan playfully punched Alex on the shoulder, "Yeah, and Francis Coppola too, eh? And Brian de Palma? All of them the great film makers of tomorrow?"

Alex nodded, "You bet your Irish ass on that!"

William couldn't resist. He put on an Italian emphasis on his New York accent, "And all those guinea bastards taking good American jobs in Hollywood too!"

Brendan had to hold Alex back for a moment, and then they resumed walking along the street.

Alex looked at William, "What have you got against Brian de Palma anyway?"

William laughed, "I got nothing against him. I'm sure he'll make something great one day."

Brendan shook his head, "I'm still betting my money on Stone. I can just feel it. He's got something big coming his way."

William looked at the darkening sky, "We should head home."

Brendan nodded, "I'll see you guys later then." He headed off.

Alex clapped William on the shoulder, "Well that leaves us to head home."

Alex and William both lived in the same apartment, on the same floor. It was almost inevitable that they had become fast friends.

Heading into the elevator, Alex looked at William, "How's that head?"

William felt his head and shrugged, "It's almost gone now."

Alex shrugged, and looked up, "What should we rent from Milo tomorrow?" Milo Airngrav ran video rental store that served the two teens very well in their love for movies. Milo would often recommend a number of films, and his judgement ranged from impeccable to horribly biased.

William thought about it, "Let's get _Death Wish_. I heard it's brilliant."

Alex grinned, "The last great Charlie Bronson film was _Once Upon a Time in the West,_ and that was years and years ago."

William cuffed Alex on the shoulder, "You need to work on your taste. You're sounding more and more like Milo every day."

Alex laughed, then squinted his left eye to make his right eye look larger. He pretended to ruffle a moustache, and spoke in a wheezier voice, "That's surely a winner there, make no mistake about it! Those Oscars are a corrupt bunch of half-wit capitalists that couldn't find their own asses with both hands!"

William laughed and stepped out of the elevator as it stopped at their floor. Alex and William headed off in opposite directions, giving each other a cheerful farewell. While William lived in a two bedroom rent, Alex had a three bedroom rent, due to the fact that he had twin sisters. Maria and Laraine were three years old and a bigger handful than William had ever seen. William swore that Alex' father Mr. Stauffer, a hearty man of tall build, was getting grey hair from those two. Alex' mother, born and raised in Little Italy by immigrant parents, seemed to have endless patience for them.

William pulled out his key and headed forward to insert it into the keyhole, when he suddenly paused.

He could hear a strange voice coming from inside.

It was a man's voice, but William couldn't quite pick up any words from what he was saying. He wondered who this man was.

Quietly turning the key in the door, William stepped inside.

His mother was talking to a man of about forty. He was well built, with a long jaw bone, and brown hair. He was wearing a suit and tie, quite formal as opposed to the clothes Alice was wearing. Both jumped when William came through the door.

"Will! Aren't you supposed to be at the movies?" Alice spoke quickly. The man did not say anything, merely stared at William.

William looked at his mother. A strange emotion was in her eyes, but he couldn't quite place it. It wasn't surprise: that was the reaction on her face and body. There was something deeper being repressed.

William shrugged, "We didn't go. Headache."

The man seemed to start, but quickly composed himself.

William turned his attention to the man, who was the same height as he was, "Who's this?"

The man came forward, a look of greeting hastily drawn onto his face, "Hi, I'm Professor Selden. But you can call me Burt."

William shook the offered hand, "Professor? You teach at university?"

Burt grinned, "Part-time. I'm more of a researcher."

William glanced at Alice, "How do you two know each other?"

Burt suddenly glanced at Alice, allowing her to answer. There was an awkwardness in Burt that William could imagine must have come from his interruption. They must have wanted to tell him about their relationship later on.

But Alice answered, "We just met a week ago. He was interested in what I do."

William looked back at Burt, "You mean teaching handicaps?"

Burt grinned, "Something like that, yeah."

The professor suddenly checked his watch, "Jesus, I gotta get going,' he looked at Alice, 'I'll speak to you tomorrow maybe?" He turned and clapped William on the shoulder, "See you later, Will."

He picked up his coat, and headed out the door.

Will frowned, "What was that all about? Is he your boyfriend or something?"

Alice shook her head, "Of course not. We just talk casually. You could say we're friends."

Will shrugged, and headed for the kitchen to get an apple, "So why would a professor at Beekman University want to know about your classes?"

Alice paused, "Well, he wanted to see the different test scores of the students. He works with a lot of information, and he needed results for his project."

Will bit into the apple, "What kind of project?"

Alice frowned, "Why so much interest in his business?"

Will looked at his mother over the apple, "Why are you so interested? It's obvious that there's more to it than just a project."

Alice sighed, "Ridiculous."

Will cocked his head to the side, "Why are you always the schoolteacher?"

Alice froze, and a wild look came over her eyes. For a very brief moment of surprise, William thought his mother would hit him. Instead she pointed a finger at her son, "You leave this matter alone. It's gone far enough."

William felt angry, but could not think of anything to say. He merely nodded, watching his mother walk away to the living room in a huff.

What had angered her so much? Why did his persistence to the subject of Burt cause such a response? Or had he caused her to remember his father?

Meeting this new man must be hard for her, William thought. And now that he considered it, he realized he did not want someone to act as his father when he wasn't. Charlie Gordon may not be there, but whoever he was, he was William's father.

Once again, he wished that he knew more about Charlie Gordon. What kind of man was he? Would he be proud of William? Would he be a good father? Could he tell William about how he had met his mother?

He went into the bathroom to brush his teeth. He was tired and wanted a good night's sleep. It took him a while to fall asleep. As though his brain needed at least a half-hour to re-wire for sleep mode. He would close his eyes in a dark, silent room, but thoughts whizzed through his head and were louder than if a man stood in the room and started singing opera.

Yawning, William went into his room, depositing the rabbit's foot in its regular place next to his bed. For all the attention he gave it, he couldn't for the life of him remember exactly how he got it. It seemed to him that he had had it all his life and had taken it for granted until recently, when he had seriously begun to wonder about his father.

He thought about Burt. The man had been friendly enough, but it seemed to William that he had been wary. Wary of what? That he was going to have to endure the fact that the woman he liked had a kid? Seemed right, but William had never been in this situation before. Alice had never dated in all the time he could remember. She seemed to cling to the memory of Charlie Gordon as much as William did, but she didn't want to. She wanted to break free, move on. He, William, wanted to know more, wanted to dwell on the unknown.

If only Alice was willing to talk about his father.

That was the last thought he had before he tried to sleep. He didn't care about what came up after that. He just wanted to sleep and wake up without a headache the next day.


	4. Chapter 3

**3**

William dreamed about the two girls he had seen in the diner. In the dream, they had gone over to him and had rubbed up against his body, smiling down at him in a peculiar way. He had reached up to touch the breasts of the brunette, and instead of staring at him, she had done nothing. William had continued on, but just as he was about to close his hands over the girl's breast, he had woken up.

Blinking his eyes wearily, he noticed that it was still 3:00 AM. He almost groaned, but then felt a stickyness on his leg.

Cursing to himself he changed his boxers. He hated when this happened. It was as though he could not control it. It didn't happen that often anymore. In fact, the last time had been a month ago, but still, it shouldn't happen, should it?

William lay back in bed, relieved that there was no stain on his sheets. He planned to throw away the old boxer. He felt mortified enough when he kept it to himself.

Still, he had enjoyed the dream. He wondered what it would be like to actually lie with a woman and be intimate. What would it be like to kiss a woman as you unclipped her bra? Usually William kept these thoughts lodged in the back of his mind, but he longed for it anyway at times.

He tried to go to sleep, but he could not get the image of that brunette out of his mind.

"" "" " "" """ "" "" " "" "" "" ""

The next morning, William got out of bed to make breakfast. On weekends, he always made breakfast for the two of them: she was always looking forward to a long rest on Saturday and Sunday mornings. He didn't mind making breakfast: it was part of his routine.

Laying out strips of bacon in the pan, William flicked on the radio to his favourite station. An old Dire Straits song was playing, and William began singing along as he minded the sizzling bacon. With his other hand he pretended to play guitar with the song

_And a crowd of young boys they're fooling around in the corner  
Drunk and dressed in their best brown baggies and their platform soles  
They dont give a damn about any trumpet playing band  
It aint what they call rock and roll  
And the sultans... Yeah the sultans, they play creole!_

William mimicked Mark Knopfler's drawl as he called out a second 'creole', letting his voice die off slowly as Knopfler's did. He grinned to himself as he avoided sparks of fat flying from the pan as he slapped down another strip. He loved bacon in the morning, it went great next to his toast.

Speaking of toast... William took out some bread from the cupboard and set two pieces into the toaster. He liked his toast a golden brown, while his mother preferred it almost black on one side. He couldn't understand what her taste buds were like, just that his were entirely different.

Alice got out of bed at around the same time that William finished scouring the frying pan of grease. William always preferred cleaning up the kitchen before eating. It was like an obsession at times, but he didn't care.

The pan cleaned, William sat down at the small table, laying down the plates of bacon, toast, and some scrambled eggs that his mother always added to the mix.

"I'm heading over to the rental store today to get a film with Alex." William asked through a mouthful of bacon.

"Good." Alice said, and poured herself a glass of orange juice.

William could tell that Alice was in a bad mood. He left it at that and went to go get Alex.

Milo Airngrav had his store an hour away from where they lived, but it was by far the best video store they'd ever been to. Besides, they liked taking the bus across New York City.

William and Alex eventually got there, blinking in the sunlight as they crossed the distance from the bus stop to the video store.

Milo grinned as they came in, "What's it going to be then, eh?" Milo was always stealing the words from the mouths of others and throwing them out to see whether his theft was recognized by the listeners.

Alex got the reference today, "Anthony Burgess' _A Clockwork Orange."_

Milo scratched his ear as he spoke to them in his thick accent, "So, what's gotten you boys to come down here today? What movies this time?"

William knew this store like it had been made for him. Prowling down the 'drama' section, he made a quick turn into the 'comedy' section, "I was thinking we could get _Dr. Strangelove_, Alex."

Alex was already in the 'action' section, "Oh for God's sake, Will. Let's get _Apocalypse Now_."

Milo chuckled, "Ach, you're both far too Americanized. Expand your minds for once!"

"We don't all come from Eastern Europe, Milo,' Alex retorted, 'I don't see you sitting through _It's a Wonderful Life."_

Milo snorted, prompting Alex to laugh at the old man's hypocrisy.

Meanwhile, William had found his film and had headed up to the counter. Alex made the usual bothersome argument about wanting to watch something else. William would go back to argue with him properly, and Milo would ofter pitch in by hollering his opinion in random outbursts from his watchful position in front of the store. That crazy old koot would hear one word from Alex or William, and it didn't matter if he had a huge line-up at the cashier, he'd yell his opinion out as loud as he could.

There were few active customers that morning (most were returning movies rather than renting them) and so it was up to the three of them to decide what would be rented. William and Alex were so used to this that they didn't even notice if they made the same argument every days. They might as well have been tying their shoes for how naturally they behaved.

As always, William muscled in two movies that Alex would spew anger about until he saw them (thereby grudgingly giving them a passable grade) and Alex himself would take a movie he swore was a masterpiece, which William would often consider hardly worth the time. There were variations, granted, but this was the most common situation born from these expeditions.

William took Alex' half of the money, and walked over to stand next to the cashier while Milo ran the movies through while giving his own judgements on the three films.

Suddenly, William stopped dead, and he raised his head, as though smelling something.

Milo noticed William standing there, and chuckled as he held up a freshly baked loaf of bread in an open paper bag, "You smelling the bread?"

William looked at Milo, "Yeah, I am. That bakery sure makes good stuff whever it is."

Milo jerked his head towards the right, "Well, if you want to get some from there, you can go over there down the street. It's a good place, old and respectable. It's been there since the sixties, and it still makes good business."

William looked at Alex, both of them hungry after a morning on the bus and in the movie store. They thanked Milo for the directions and they headed out of the store. Before they left, Milo threw another interesting line at their retreating backs, "_Cleverness is good, patience is better_."

Alex paused, wondering where the passage was from, "Damnit, I can't think of where the hell that's from."

William shrugged, "Let's just head over to the bakery."

The two of them found it easily enough. The street outside was cloaked in a smell of bread, cookies, and other delights. William could have stood out there all day and inhaled that smell. Be that as it may, he was very eager to get inside and buy something to eat.

An older woman stood behind the counter. She looked to be in her late fifties, with a wrinkled face and steel-grey hair. She had a smile on her face as she spoke with a pair of customers. William and Alex waited in line, until their turn arrived and the other customers walked out.

The lady turned to look at her next customers, and her smile suddenly faded. She paused, for the longest time, frowning at the two young men in front of her. She seemed to be reminded of someone in her past, but her scrutiny was disturbing in its own way. The two youths realized that she was staring at William.

William felt cold as the lady continued to stare silently. She made no noise, and her face was screwed up in concentration as she looked at William's face. It made the room's atmosphere very awkward, as though they had stumbled upon the scene of a crime.

Alex cleared his throat and spoke, "Er, can we get any help here?"

The lady suddenly snapped out of it, looking incredibly flustered, "Oh dear, I'm so sorry. I didn't mean to do that,' she suddenly frowned, 'It's just I could have sworn that I've seen you before, young man."

William was even more puzzled: he had never been here before. He said as much to the lady.

The lady sighed, "Well never mind. I'm sure it must be a mistake. Now what would you like, dears?"

Alex looked at the various treats that were on display, his eyes shining with longing, "Well, let's see here..." He pored over the glass, first looking at the treats, then at the back wall where the freshly baked bread was sitting, waiting to be purchased.

William followed Alex' gaze, "Can we have a loaf of that bread over there?" He pointed at the loaf he wanted.

The lady was still looking puzzled as she took the loaf and accepted the payment that Alex gave her. She was clearly obsessed with this chance that William represented someone from her past. William and Alex exchanged a look when she had turned away, but said nothing about it as they thanked her for the bread.

They were just about to head out of the store, when another customer burst into the store. The man was big and burly, and in his haste, he accidentally knocked over the broom that was balanced precariously on the wall.

Out of instinct, William bent down to pick it up. Standing up, he held the broom in both hands, facing Alex, the customer, and the lady. Awkwardly putting it back, he followed Alex out of the store.

Had he been slower, he would have noticed the look of shocked realization on the lady's face before he had walked out.


	5. Chapter 4

**4**

William was still thinking of the old lady in the bakery while he and Alex watched one of the movies in his apartment the next day. Alex crowed that it was a fantastic film, a rare sight, for it had been one of William's films.

William was less impressed, though. Normally he would have felt happy after seeing a great movie like this one, but for some reason he couldn't get the enjoyment out of it like usual. It was strange.

Then they began the second film, which in William's opinion wasn't as good as the first. Granted, this was Alex' choice, so it was obviously Rock Hudson's "Seconds". Halfway in, they stopped to get a drink from the kitchen and they sat back down in front of the television to continue watching.

Just as he was about to put the film back in, William paused. He suddenly knew that he had to get to the bottom of this or else it would bug him. Maybe she had recognized him based on his father!

He looked at Alex, "Why do you think that lady thought she knew me?"

Alex shrugged, "I don't know. Maybe she's just getting old and made a mistake."

William shook his head, "No way. She was convinced that she'd seen me before."

Alex looked at William in confusion, "What's gotten into you anyway? You're not going to see that woman again."

William frowned in thought, "Maybe I will."

Alex sighed, "Well let's try and watch the next film first."

William automatically leaned forward to put the tape into the VCR, but then stopped, "No."

Alex stared at William incredulously, "What do you mean?"

William looked at his friend. Could he really be so apathetic? Could he actually not understand what was bugging him?

He handed the movies to Alex, "I'm going back to the bakery. You can watch this at your place, but I'm going to find out what the hell is going on."

Alex shook his head wearily, not even looking at the movies that William was prompting him to take, "Well then I'm coming with you."

Privately, William was suddenly very relieved and grateful to Alex, even as the two of them headed out to go revisit the bakery.

As they headed out of the apartment, the two youths practically bumped into Alex' father, "Ah hello boys."

"Hello Mr. Strauss." William replied.

Mr. Strauss was a middle-aged man who was taller than his son and with a paler complexion. His dirty blond beard was going turning grey, but his dark blue eyes were sharp as ever. He looked like a man in charge of his life.

Alex nodded at his father, "What's going on, Dad?"

Mr. Strauss jerked his head, "I need you to go back home and take care of the girls. Your grandfather is coming for a visit, and he asked me to pick him up from his house. He's not feeling up to driving."

Had this been any other time, the two youths would have been glad to see old Grandfather Strauss. The man was a kind person, who worked very leisurely hours as a psychiatrist in New York, despite his ripe old age. Dr. Strauss frequently came by his son's family, for he loved his grandchildren dearly. However, he had also taken a great liking to William, and the old man would sit with him simply to chat. William didn't mind at all. Dr. Strauss was kind, and cared for William's well-being. Alex sometimes joked that William was Dr. Strauss' favourite patient.

Alex shrugged helplessly at William and headed for his apartment. William followed, for even though he was curious to return to the bakery, he wanted to see Dr. Strauss again.

The sisters were sitting in their bedroom, reading books as usual. Alex glanced at William, "Let's watch that other film we were supposed to finish. Dad's gonna take an hour to get there and back."

William shrugged, and they finished off "Seconds". Just as the credits appeared, Mr. Strauss and his father came in through the door.

William looked up cheerfully at Dr. Strauss, "How are you, sir?"

Dr. Strauss was the oldest person that William knew. He had never asked Strauss' exact age, but had he guessed, he would have wagered the age to be in between eighty-four and ninety. His beard was shockingly white, but well trimmed like his hair. His face was lined, and his movements stiff. William fancied Dr. Strauss had a look of Sigmund Freud to him, but with a manner that better suited a priest than a scientist. He was concerned not just with the logical aspects of the problem, but also the human sides to it. The perfect psychiatrist.

The old man smiled a crinkled smile at William, "I'm well, young Kinnian. Very well indeed." There was a sort of weariness behind his emotions, no matter what he was feeling. William determined it was age that had harrowed into his bones and had weakened him down. However, William saw a nobility in his old age, a lifetime of experience in his face.

William pulled the film out of the VCR, "Anything special happen this week, Doctor?"

Dr. Strauss shook his head, "Nothing out of the usual, William. And with you? How are your headaches and your dreams?" He was particularly worried about William's headaches. William didn't share his dedicated concern, but obliged to answer his questions.

William shrugged, "They come and go. There's no way for me to tell when the next ones show up."

Dr. Strauss nodded, a look of relief on his face. Doubtless to hear that they weren't getting worse, William thought, and he smiled, shrugging it off.

Alex stood up, "So you're staying for dinner, Grandpa?"

Dr. Strauss smiled at his grandson, "I'd love to stay for dinner, Alex. Thank-you for the offer." He and Alex chuckled, but were interrupted by Alex' sisters, who ran into the room squealing at the sight of their grandfather.

Seeing this happy family, William felt a sudden pang of jealousy. Alex and his sisters had a complete family and also a doting grandfather so late in life. They were so happy together, and William knew that he would never have that with his mother alone. He wished he knew more about his family, especially his father's side, which was the side denied to him.

He picked up the two films that he and Alex had watched and prepared to slip away as best he could.

Dr. Strauss looked at him sharply, "Where are you headed, William?"

William grinned nervously. The old doctor looked surprised at this sudden behaviour, but William wanted to get out of there.

Quickly he gestured towards the door, "I have to go return these films and I have to get some bread from the bakery."

Dr. Strauss frowned, "The bakery? By that video store you always go to?"

William nodded, "Yeah."

Dr. Strauss paused, and then said, "You could get better bread elsewhere, and closer to home, William."

William suddenly felt a bit awkward. He didn't want to be given other places to go by Strauss. He wanted to go to that bakery and find out what that woman knew.

He nodded vaguely, "I'll definitely look around, Doctor. Thank you."

He headed out the door, feeling bad about lying to an old friend and mentor such as Dr. Strauss.


	6. Chapter 5

**5**

William sighed as he fingered the rabbit's foot that was all his father had left him.

Every time he really looked at the rabbit's foot, he kept asking himself questions that he could never answer. Who was his father? What had happened to him?

He stepped out of the bus and walked over into the video store. By the time that he got from his apartment to the store after watching two movies in a row, it was near five o' clock, and he knew that his mother would be wondering where he was.

William sighed: he'd cross that bridge when he got to it. But for now, he had to find out who that woman was and what she might have known about his father.

He walked into the store and handed the films over to Milo, "They were pretty good, Milo. Thanks."

Milo grinned, "Ach, you kids. How did Alex enjoy that Rock Hudson flick?"

William shrugged, "Same as anything he'll ever make."

Milo sighed, "So you saw them both?"

William nodded, "Yeah, why?"

Milo snorted, "Yech. You kids have too much damn time on your hands! You sit around and watch films? That's it?"

William rolled his eyes; Milo was ever the old-fashioned one, "So what do you suggest instead?"

Milo gave a sly grin, and uttered another literary quotation, "_Let us work without theorizing... 'tis the only way to make life endurable_."

William knew that it was probably going to be something obvious. Probably something not even fictional. Maybe some philosopher that Milo was a fan of.

He tried to think of someone that Milo would read frequently, "Er... John Locke?"

Milo laughed, "Not even close, Willy! Voltaire!"

William groaned. Of course. A French writer obviously.

Milo suddenly poked him in the ribs, "You should find a job, Kinnian. Get yourself prepared for the real world."

William thought about that. It wasn't that bad of an idea, "Okay, Milo, so where do I go?"

Milo made a grand gesture towards his counter top, "How about this! Work here in the video store! You might make a movie one day!"

William laughed. The day a video store clerk would make it big in Hollywood would be a fine day indeed. And besides, working with Milo would be unbearable for William, and he was smart enough not to accept the offer. However, the idea of a job was interesting nevertheless.

After William said as much, Milo raised an eyebrow, "So if not a job, what you going to get this time? Another Hollywood film?"

William shook his head, "We still have number three to watch. But in the meantime I gotta go back to that bakery."

Milo shrugged, "It's decent, but I prefer the bakery down next to Hemming's. They have bakers right from Switzerland down there working with the bread. Fine bunch of people."

William laughed, "Well you enjoy that European company, I'm going to a true-blue American bakery."

He headed out of the door and began walking for the bakery. As he headed down the street, something caught his eye.

A man was walking on the opposite side of the street, holding an umbrella low over his head against the wind. William grinned at the sight; sure it was cloudy, but there was no rain at all.

Then he noticed that the man looked strangely familiar, but couldn't place it exactly. Thinking little of it, he headed into the bakery.

To his disappointment, the woman wasn't there, but instead a young man with a red moustache that was immaculately trimmed. He looked at William, "Can I help you?"

William sighed, "No. I was hoping I could speak to someone. There's this old lady who works here. She was here yesterday, and I was wondering if she was here."

The man shook his head, "She works next Friday and Saturday. She takes Sunday off to go to Church."

William nodded, "Okay. Do you mind telling me her name so I can contact her myself?"

The man again shook his head, "I can't give that info. Protection of employees."

William frowned, "What?"

The man shrugged, "Them's the rules, bucko. Sorry."

William sighed and left the bakery, thinking he might as well just wait for Friday.

As he was leaving, he noticed that the man with the umbrella had crossed the street and headed into the bakery. William turned around and headed towards the bus stop.

"" "" " " "" """ "" " "" " " "

As he sat in the bus, he suddenly looked at the advertisements pasted on the insides of the bus. He tried to read some of them as the bus made a few turns, and out of nowhere, one of his headaches got him hard. Cursing under his breath, he clutched his forehead with one hand and shut his eyes.

Opening them again, he suddenly was jerked to the side. The bus had made it to a stop. William got out to stretch his legs, trying to get his mind of the headache. He didn't even care that he was five blocks from home. He'd walk the rest for all he cared.

William headed down the road, trying to distract himself from the headache that was hurting him, and his eyes suddenly rested on a woman that was walking towards him.

She wore her hair uniquely, and her clothes had little care put into them, it seemed. She reminded William suddenly of Annie Hall in the sense that she looked like one of those free spirits who cared little for fashion ideas of normal society. However, in William's honest opinion, she was too old to dress in such a way. She looked to be in her forties, and the lines on her face that suddenly appeared as he neared her made it clear that she was no longer the young woman she may have been before.

The woman's eyes were hidden by pink sunglasses, and William didn't know if she was looking at him at all, but despite her obvious age, he was suddenly attracted to this woman. She seemed to attract an air of carelessness and casualness that transcended the usual needs of society. William wondered how he could have seen that all in just a minute of seeing her, but felt that he had guessed right.

If she had seen him, then she showed nothing of it. She moved on, not even looking at William as she walked past him. William shrugged and moved on. He wasn't going to see her again.

He pulled out his rabbit's foot again, studying it as though he had just gotten it. He never tired of looking at it.

As he walked along the streets that he knew were not far from his home, William thought of what his mother would say when he made it home later than she preferred. She liked to be told where he was going, but hopefully she asked Alex' family and they told her where he was.

Eventually, the apartment came into view. William quickly glanced from left to right on the road, and ran across.

As he ran across, in the corner of his eye, he could have sworn that he saw a familiar-looking red-haired man turn a corner and disappear.


	7. Chapter 6

**6**

Alice looked at him irritatedly from the dinner table, "What took you so long, William?"

William sat down, "Sorry mom. I was trying to get some stuff settled out."

Alice sighed; she wasn't usually angry at him for long. She gave him a kiss on the cheek, "So how was your day anyway?"

William shrugged, "Watched some good movies with Alex, and Dr. Strauss came by."

Alice nodded, "Yes, I was talking to him. He's worried about you and your headaches. Plus he also said you had gone out to return some films."

"Well yeah, and I also went to see this bakery that looked pretty interesting." William replied.

Alice paused, "A bakery?"

William nodded, "Yeah."

Alice looked at her son with a blank look. She seemed to be on the verge of different emotions, but unsure of which one to take. William felt awkward under her sudden scrutiny, and tried to change the subject, "By the way, Mom, Milo from the video store suggested I get a job."

Alice smiled in surprise, "Really! That's an interesting idea honey. I'm glad you're looking to earn some money and get more responsible."

William smiled and put some food in his mouth.

Alice looked at him again after a few minutes of eating, "So where have you been looking?"

William shrugged, "Milo offered me a position there, but I turned him down."

Alice smiled, "You couldn't stand to work with him?"

William nodded, "I don't think either of us would stand each other for longer than half an hour. I'm going to look around somewhere else."

Alice swallowed another spoonful of food, and spoke again, "If you want, I can see if we need a job at the school."

William paused. He didn't mind working with his mother, or being around her, but he didn't like the school on a whole. He was a bit creeped out by the place, as if there was a bad memory there that he couldn't remember.

He spoke up, "I think I'll look at all the options first before I make a decision, Mom."

Alice nodded, smiling, "Good idea, Will."

"" """ """ "" " """ " "" " """ "" "

The next day, Will went to the Strauss' home down the hall. Dr. Strauss had already gone home, but Alex cheerfully let him in. They had a tradition of watching "Magnum P.I." when it came on. It was perhaps the only television show that they both liked, as strange as that was.

"How are you doing?" Alex asked as William walked in.

William shrugged, "Pretty good. Didn't see the woman at the bakery."

Alex shrugged, "So? Try again later."

William looked at Alex, "I have a feeling that I'm being followed wherever I go."

Alex looked at him in bemusement, "What?"

"Yeah, I mean, that guy from the first time we were in the bakery, the one who knocked over the broom by accident. He was following me yesterday. Plus there was this red-head guy who seemed to be following me too."

Alex grinned, "You're crazy man. Why the hell would they be following you?"

William sighed, and looked at the television set. The theme for "Magnum P.I." began to play, and the two youths automatically bobbed their heads to the music. Damn, it was a silly show, William thought, but it was still pretty catchy.

Normally William enjoyed the show, but he was still thinking of the umbrella man, the redhead, and the old lady. Why was the redhead trying to keep William from contacting the lady? Was there something that the lady knew about William that the two men didn't want him to know? Jesus, this was like the movie "Missing"a movie that had made William weep with frustration. It was a film about an old man and his daughter-in-law trying to find their son and husband who went missing in Chile during a U.S.-backed rule by Pinochet. Constantly they were blocked from the truth by people who knew it but denied them what they wanted.

Was this what was happening to William? He felt a seething anger begin to build deep down in his gut, and he tried to just watch the show.

A commercial about a new restaurant was just ending. William was about to turn away, when suddenly a tone of voice caught his attention.

"Do you have a relative who may be suffering from a loss of memory, or is suffering a severe change in personality? Are they complaining of lack of sleep, headaches, or abnormal twitches?"

William stared at the commercial as it went on, advertising a medicine known as Ferxan 23. It was supposedly able to reduce the symptoms by 50% in the first week. It had been proven to work on several clients, and they voiced their supports on the television.

William was suddenly curious. He had heard that name before, Ferxan. It was odd how that name seemed to ring in his head when he heard it.

He looked at Alex, "Did your grandfather recommend that to me before?"

Alex frowned, "I dunno, why?"

William looked at the television again, "I've heard that name somewhere before..."

An image came on the television of the a bottle full of Ferxan 23 pills. The voice was listing the phone number if you wanted to know more about it. Alex offered William another round of popcorn.

Suddenly a headache hit William, and he almost groaned from the pain. He had been watching too much television maybe, or it was the smell of the popcorn.

Alex glanced at William again, "What's into you? This whole thing is really messing with your mind, dude."

William sighed grimly, "I want to find out what the fuck is going on, Alex. Something's being kept from me and I'll bet you anything that my father is involved in this whole thing."

Alex seemed to stare in astonishment at William, and glanced back to the screen as "Magnum P.I." came back on, "Well can we at least finish this episode?"


	8. Chapter 7

**7**

The next Saturday came around, and William headed to the bakery again just after finishing supper with his mom. He wondered if the elderly lady would be there, whoever she was. William hoped the red-haired man wouldn't be there, but something told William that he would have done something to prevent another meeting.

William walked into the bakery, taking in the beautiful scents of the various breads, cookies, and cakes that were neatly placed all around. He could almost taste these things, the smell was that strong.

He looked at the person behind the counter and cursed under his breath.

It was the red-haired man again.

William looked at him, trying to hide his disappointment, "Is that elderly lady working today?"

The red-haired man shook his head, "Sorry bud. She felt a bit under the weather."

William suddenly felt angry. He felt a hatred for this man in front of him, much like when he had been sitting with Alex. Before he could stop himself, he spoke again, "So why were you following me the first day we met?"

The redhead frowned, "What are you talking about?"

"You know god-damn well what I'm talking about! You followed me to my home and when I turned around you tried to hide!"

The man shrugged again, looking bemused, "That wasn't me. I think you've made a mistake."

William suddenly knew he had made a mistake. A grave mistake. He had told his stalker that he knew about it. This meant that he would simply disappear for now only to be replaced with someone else. Someone far more careful. William knew that he would have to keep his eyes open.

The man spoke again, "So did you want to buy anything? If not, I'm going to have to ask you to leave."

William heard that condescending tone and was goaded into a response, "Yeah I'm going now, but you'd better leave me alone from now on you son of..."

"Hey Barton! Give me my fucking position for Christ's sake! I've been cleaning the machinery all morning!"

William's head jumped to the door that led to the back of the store. The voice was a raw growl that sounded wheezy with age. William wondered who that was, and if they knew the old lady he had seen in the bakery.

He caught a movement. The redhead- his name was Barton? William wondered- move for the door, doubtless to answer the man inside.

Suddenly the door burst open, and out came a man whose appearance matched the voice completely. The man was old, grey-haired, and built like a barrel. One of his legs was lame, and he limped along with the air of a man who is used to limping around on one good leg.

Barton seemed to look outraged just for a moment, or so it somewhat seemed to William, but his voice was controlled, "Your shift on the counter..."

"...began a half-hour ago like it always god-damn does! Don't try to fool me into..." The man looked at William, realizing that there was a customer in the store, and all the anger in his face melted away so fast it was as if a mask had been unfolded from his face.

William was reminded of the way the old woman had looked at him, but while she had been full of puzzlement, this man's face was full of recognition and shock. William felt his heart hammer; did he know something?

For the moment, though, the old man looked as if he was going to have a heart attack. He clutched his chest and gasped out breaths in what was almost a look of horror.

Barton stepped forward, "What's going on? Are you alright?"

There was definitely a nervous edge to Barton's voice, William thought, and no wonder. The man was about to collapse on the floor.

The man suddenly spoke in a harsh whisper, "Charlie?"

William felt time stop. His hopes, his dreams, had been confirmed. This man had known his father.

The man stepped forward, reaching out to grab William, it seemed, "Charlie Gordon? It's not possible..."

William spoke up, "He was my father." He had to pause in his sentence several times out of sheer nervousness. This excited, shaky feeling was like how he felt when he looked at Playboy magazines, but it was so different in another way. This must be what Columbus felt when he saw the New World. Or what Alexander felt when he sat on Babylon's throne. Or what Francis Ford Coppola felt when he accepted his Oscar for "The Godfather".

Suddenly Barton's voice rang clear, "Mr. Robertson I need you to hold yourself together, and you,' he said turning on William, 'if that will be all, I'm asking you to leave the store."

William looked at the man again, "I need to speak to you later."

Mr. Robertson nodded eagerly, "Meet me at 9 o'clock this evening." He turned back through the door.

William suddenly felt panicky. "Where?" he asked.

Mr. Robertson turned to Barton, completely ignoring William, "Barton, remind me to go talk to my friend Bushwick about that 1629 bet he made at the Aqueduct Racetrack." He then turned away from both William and Barton, closing the door behind him.

Before Barton could say anything, William headed out of the store. His euphoria had been replaced with a paralyzed bewilderment. Where the hell was he supposed to meet this man? All he had said was 9 o' clock. But where? At the bakery? Barton would be there, and William didn't want Barton to hear what was discussed.

William walked along the street, wondering what he was supposed to do now, and then out of the blue, he looked to his left.

Milo's video store was there as usual, and William felt his usual feelings of eagerness when he saw such movie stores. But this time, something in his mind clicked. Milo could help him with this.

Crossing the street, William hurried into the store.

Milo was standing there, talking with a big man whose back was to William. He seemed vaguely familiar.

Milo suddenly noticed William, and spoke aloud, "Ah William! I'll be right with you my friend!" He turned back to the man, and the two bade farewell.

William froze as the man turned for the door. Although he kept his face almost completely hidden from William, William could tell that he had seen this man before. It was the umbrella man. The man who had followed him part of the way to the store.

The umbrella man didn't look at William, but instead he headed out with a quick pace that belied his bulk. William turned on Milo, "Who was that man?"

Milo shrugged, and answered through his thick accent, "Ach, I dunno. A nice man who was looking for a good German film so I recommended "Die Ratten" with Maria Schell. You know that one right?"

William shook his head. Milo sighed in contempt, "No knowledge of good films."

William stepped forward, "I don't have time for this. I need your help."

Milo frowned, "Help?"

William spoke fast, "I'm going to meet a man who knew my father. I tried to arrange a meeting with him, but he didn't give me any information on where he would meet me."

Milo smiled suddenly, "So what? You want me to read his mind or something?"

"No, but if you could talk to him, you could get the information out of him on my behalf."

Milo paused, thinking it over, "Okay, but you're sure he didn't say anything to you?"

William nodded, "I asked him where to meet, and he just told his co-worker something about meeting an old friend about..."

Then he stopped. He stopped in mid-sentence, not even aware of Milo's presence. William knew then what Mr. Robertson had done. He had given William the address in a code.

Milo tapped William on the forehead, "Hey! You okay there?"

William grinned, "Never mind what I just said Milo. I know where he wants me to go."

William hurried out of the store, checking his watch. He had an hour and a half to get to 1629 Bushwick on the Brooklyn/Queens border. Evergreens Cemetery.


	9. Chapter 8

**8**

William hoped his mother would get the message he had left on the door. He wondered about what she was doing right now, whether she was worried about him or whether she wondered what he was doing.

Standing outside the cemetery, William had little else to do but think. Usually when he was alone he would reenact movies in his head, and even mouth aloud the lines to himself. He could go on for hours at a time.

Was Mr. Robertson on his way? William didn't know whether he'd be here or if Barton had found a way to break up the meeting.

Thinking of Barton, William turned and looked around to see if anyone was following him. He saw no one, but that meant nothing. He turned to peer into the graveyard's entrance and saw nobody. In the bright sunset of the summer sun, William could still see most of what he'd see in full daylight.

Standing by himself at the entrance of a graveyard, William felt nervous. There was something about graveyards that had always disturbed him. Perhaps it was the reason that most people went into the graveyard. It was a reason that ensured they never came out again.

But the sunset was beautiful, William acknowledged to himself. It made him wish that there was a beautiful song playing to match the setting.

Suddenly a voice called out, "Kid."

He turned in excitement, recognizing the voice instantly.

Mr. Robertson limped up to him from an old car that was parked on the side of the road. He looked as nervous as William himself felt.

William offered the man his hand, "Mr. Robertson..."

"Don't call me that. My friends call me Gimpy." Gimpy said gruffly as he shook the offered hand.

William grinned, "Well, thanks for coming Gimpy."

Gimpy must have heard Charlie in William's voice, for he began to blink rapidly and his other hand twitched. He turned into the graveyard and began limping in.

William followed, confused, "Uh, Gimpy, where are we going?"

"We're gonna see an old friend of mine and your dad's." Gimpy answered.

William felt a thrill of deep excitement again, and he hurried up to the old man, "You were close with my dad?"

Gimpy sighed, "As close as I could be, I guess. We both worked in the bakery. Back when old Mr. Donner owned it, Charlie used it like a second home. Donner looked after him like he was his own son."

William was astonished that that bakery had been so important to his father, but also puzzled, "Who's Mr. Donner?"

Gimpy pointed in front of him suddenly. William followed his gaze, and saw a plain grey tombstone that read,

_**Arthur Morgan Donner** _

_**September 23 1910- October 6 1978**_

_**"I will instruct you and teach you in the way you should go; I will counsel you and watch over you."**_

William looked at Gimpy, who stared hard at the grave, "Beautiful words."

Gimpy glanced at William, "I picked them myself. I was looking for something that could best describe him."

William looked at the words etched into the stone, "He was a protector? A shepherd?"

Gimpy nodded his head sadly, "A shepherd is right. That bakery protected us all. Donner looked after us at his expense. If one of us needed money, he helped. If they needed an extra loaf, one was given to them." Gimpy suddenly looked ashamed, "I was a dishonest man at the time. I took advantage of his trust many times. I was a god-damned fool and an arrogant bastard back then. But of course you must know that."

William looked at him, "What do you mean?"

Gimpy stared at him, "Charlie never told you?"

Before William could answer, Gimpy sighed, "Well, I guess he wouldn't. He always thought the best of me, even after that time..." Suddenly he stopped, and looked at William.

"How is Charlie? How come he disappeared from the bakery like he did? What happened to him all these years?"

William sighed, "I don't know."

Gimpy frowned, "What?"

William shuddered, "I've never seen my father before. I don't know what he looked like, I don't know how he acted, or what he did. I don't know my own father." The words he spoke hurt him, more than ever before when he just thought them. Saying them out loud, and also saying it to another person, made tears prick at William's eyes.

Gimpy seemed not even to breathe. He looked awkwardly at the grave, to give William some privacy as he cuffed at his eyes.

That done, Gimpy looked back at him, "What do you want to know about him?"

William looked Gimpy in the eye, "Everything you know."

"" " " "" """ " "" " " "" ""

Gimpy spent the next half-hour talking about Charlie Gordon. How he had started work as a young adult, how he had been the butt-end of casual jokes, how he had been the most good-natured of the workers, how he had laughed at himself, how he had suddenly changed, how he had gained great intelligence and had been ostracized for it, how he had then returned several months later as he had always been, and then how he had left of his own accord to never being heard from again.

As Gimpy spoke, William could see the guilt and shame of his deeds etched in the very memories of Charlie. And no wonder, for he had been one of the chief executors of the petition to fire Charlie.

At the end of it, Gimpy looked grim. He balanced himself on his good leg, straightened his back, and spoke resignedly to William, "That's my story of Charlie, and if you want to blame me for my sins, then you're welcome to it. I did many bad things in my life, I admit that, but I treated your father good enough compared to others, and I was able to show him some decency before he left."

William wanted to be angry. He wanted to feel anger towards Gimpy for how he had mistreated Charlie with snide comments and failure to act against other jokes, but somehow, William couldn't draw up the emotion. Gimpy had changed, having had to live with his guilt, and it was all so long ago before William was born. And there were deeper emotions that were in William's gut churning around.

His father had been a retard. William almost flinched at that word. No, he had been challenged. A low IQ and an almost furious desire to learn, according to what Gimpy said.

William looked at Gimpy, "So Charlie got smart?"

Gimpy nodded, "Unbelievably smart. People got scared to death of him. Myself included, because I saw an intelligence I'd never seen before. It was that Charlie that confronted me about my ripping off Donner. I quit all that shit, reluctantly I'm sad to say. But he was different. He got colder and more arrogant. He got promotions and showed us up with his intelligence. Maybe he didn't mean to, maybe he never got a real handle on it. I'd believe that since the next time we saw him was when he was back to his old self."

William looked the old man right in the eye, "And you started treating him nice? Only after everything you'd done to him and everything he'd done to you?"

Gimpy flushed with the accusation, but nodded defiantly, "I did. You wanna hear me blubber about how I got a taste of my own medicine, fine. Yeah I did. And I pitied him, even more than I had before. I got a handle on how I'd been treating him."

William looked back at Donner's grave, "What happened to Donner?"

Gimpy followed William's gaze, "He was in a car accident. Poor fellow didn't like driving ever in his life. And as he got older his eyesight got worse. So one day he's heading home on a cold night, and he accidentally drove onto the curb and hit a telephone pole. His old car didn't stand a chance."

William shuddered at the words, but also the grim tone of Gimpy's voice, "Where was he driving from?"

Gimpy pondered the question over, "If I remember correctly, it was coming back from a drink at the bar._ The Muddy Duck: _don't ask me how they named it that_. _He loved going down there for a drink and a chat with his friends. I still go there sometimes, but it ain't the same now that Donner's gone."

William was suddenly curious, "You mean you weren't there when he died?"

Gimpy shook his head, "I had a heart attack that night. Donner came to visit me at the hospital and then went to the Duck."

William looked at Gimpy, "Do you think I could go visit the place?"

Gimpy paused, "Why?"

William shrugged, "Maybe my dad went there?"

Gimpy fidgeted, "No he never did. He wasn't a drinker. Some of his buddies once made him look like a buffoon after getting him drunk. I tried to stop them..." he broke off when he realized how pathetic his defence was.

William at last felt an anger towards this man, "I wish I could get angry with you. You treated my dad as a means to an end. But you could have kept it a secret from me. You could have bull-shitted your way through a story that made you look good."

Gimpy nodded in agreement, "The thought crossed my mind. But I knew that Charlie would have told you his side. So I came clean. A boy should know his father, and all the wrongs that were made against him."

William sighed, "I'm not gonna say anything else about it. That's for you to live with for the rest of your life." He turned and headed for home.

When he was out of earshot, Gimpy gazed upwards to look at the stars. He didn't move for another twenty minutes before finally turning for his car and heading home.

The umbrella man waited another ten minutes before leaving the cemetery.


	10. Chapter 9

**9**

William woke up the next day, unsure of what to do next.

Gimpy had told him so much about his father the previous evening, things he'd never dreamed of knowing about him. His job, his low IQ, the way Mr. Donner had looked out for him all those years. The amount of knowledge he'd gained that night had almost overwhelmed him, and as he had sat on the bus, thinking of all the little details, he knew that he needed to write it down as soon as he could. He had spent that whole evening writing feverishly, desperate to not let his mother hear him. He didn't know why, but for some reason he felt that he ought not to tell his mother about this search. There was just something about this that didn't feel right.

He hid the records of what he'd written under his bed, underneath his small film collection. Aside from "Midnight Express", he also had "The Third Man", "Woman in the Window", "The Conversation", "Rebel Without a Cause", and "Sleuth".

Now it was the next morning. William got up and ate some breakfast, listening to the radio for a little bit. He wasn't really listening though. He was thinking of his father, and how he had gone from a low IQ to a genius that had intellectually trounced everyone there. He had scared them into getting rid of him. But what had caused that? William wondered if the now-deceased Mr. Donner had known, given his closeness to Charlie, and he wished he could ask his mother.

He suddenly wanted to speak to Gimpy again. It wasn't as much to speak to someone who had known his father. William felt sure that Gimpy had told him all there was to know about his father. Any discrepancies in the story would have to be filled in by someone else. It was that someone else that William wanted to find out about.

But he also wanted to find out about that redhead- Barton, Gimpy had called him- or that umbrella man. Did Gimpy know them? Was there any chance that Gimpy could give him any information? How could William speak to Gimpy again without having the spies know?

He thought about it even as he finished cleaning up the kitchen. He had had scrambled eggs today, along with some orange juice. He felt shaken out of his normal routine, in more ways than one.

He looked at the clock; ten-thirty. Unusually late for him, but he had spent hours writing down everything that Gimpy had said. William didn't regret this lapse in his fatigue, however. This was a taste of the information he'd so badly wanted to learn for most of his life.

In the meantime, though, he was going to meet up with Alex and speak to him about what had happened. He had to tell Alex all this as soon as he could.

Alice had gotten up much earlier than him, and was surprised at his laziness.

"You're normally up before me. You feeling okay?" she asked him.

William nodded his head, "I'm feeling fine, mom. I was just reading a book and lost track of the time."

"Be more careful next time, sweetie. You ought to get ready for the new school year coming up." Leave it to Alice, a school teacher, to remind her son about school during the summer.

William sighed, "Come on, mom. Can we leave school out of it for now?"

Alice smiled, "You love school, you just don't know it yet."

William smirked to himself. He liked half of school, and with any luck he'd be able to avoid the other half as much as he could.

* * *

Later that day William headed off to meet Alex down the hall.

It turned out that Old Dr. Strauss opened the door, "Good morning, William!" he said, smiling at the youth.

William smiled, "How are you feeling, Doctor?"

"I was just about to ask you that question myself. Any headaches this morning?"

"Not yet, but that's probably because I was asleep for most of it. I figured I'd sleep in today."

Dr. Strauss smiled, "As you get older, you'll find sleep a loss in precious time that you feel could be spent doing something else. And after that, when you reach my age, you find yourself making up for that lack of sleep."

William smiled out of politeness to the old man, "Is Alex awake?"

Dr. Strauss shook his head, "No, no, he's not here right now. His father took him on some errands. He'll be back soon though."

William shrugged, "That's okay."

Dr. Strauss smiled, "Off to see Milo again?"

"No actually, but... now that you mention it, I guess we were."

"Well I wouldn't waste a perfectly good trip on Alex. He'll watch whatever you bring back unless it's a romance."

William laughed genuinely at that. It was true; for all his arguing and contradicting and stubbornness, Alex did end up watching anything that William brought back, though romances were the one thing he'd never sit through. He'd take one of Milo's old Polish films over a soppy love story. William personally felt drawn to it, though he'd never let that on to his friend. It was some part of him that wanted that companionship so badly, but didn't know how to obtain it.

But even as he laughed at Dr. Strauss' wit, he was thinking of the brilliant idea he had come up with in his head. Strauss had mentioned the one man who, besides Alex, might be able, or at least be willing, to believe him.

The very conspiracy theorist himself, Milo would surely be happy to help William out, for even as he thought about what Milo could do, William was coming up with an excellent plan to contact Gimpy again without alerting either Barton or the umbrella man.

* * *

Speaking about what he had found out, William realized halfway through his ranting that even Milo might have scoffed at what he was talking about. But as William had initially thought, Milo did not find it strange that people might be following other people. William supposed that Milo would know, considering his Soviet background. Maybe the Communists were followed by the secret police up there as well.

Milo had been surprised that the umbrella man had been one of the two men following William around, "Ach, he's a good man! I should have seen something odd about him! Just goes to show how people can smile and smile, yet be a villain!"

William groaned, "Cut the Shakespeare, Milo. I need you to help me out here."

"Ah yes. This Gimpy fellow. What do you want me to do?"

"Well, I want you to contact him somehow. You ought to come up with something, right?"

"Well, sure, but what's his name?"

"Gimpy Robertson. He's the one who met me and told me about my father."

Milo's eyes widened, "Ahhh. So what did he have to say?" In the many times that Milo had known William and Alex, they had gotten to talking about themselves, so he somewhat knew of William's lack of knowledge on his father.

"He said a lot, but it doesn't make sense. I was hoping I could talk to him again, and soon. I'll need you to arrange it for me."

Milo nodded, "I'll get to it. You stay outside the store." Pulling a 'Be back soon' sign from under the counter, Milo pasted it onto the door, and he and William stepped outside onto the street.

Milo locked the store behind him, "So what time and place do you want?"

William shrugged, "I dunno, just come up with something."

Milo laughed, "You'd make a lousy negotiator. You should have been born in Bryansk instead of Brooklyn." Turning around with a chuckle, he loped off towards the bakery.

William sighed and leaned against the window of the video store. All he could do now was wait.


	11. Chapter 10

**10**

Milo arrived back a full thirty minutes after he had left.

William had nearly given up on him before he'd returned, and was astonished at the time it had taken for the man to get back.

"What the hell was that all about?" He exclaimed, "What was going on over there?"

Milo shrugged, "You have to take things into account, William."

William almost wondered if he was joking, "Such as?"

"Long lines."

William slapped his palm to his head, which he knew wouldn't help him for later on. But this was ridiculous.

"So you're telling me that you were in there so long because of the _line_?"

Milo snorted, "You know nothing of secrecy and subtlety. It must be an American thing."

William sighed, "So what happened?"

Milo spoke again, "Gimpy wasn't there. He hasn't shown up for work today. Heart attack, it seems."

William was jolted into an intense thought process, with ideas and sentences echoing in his skull so fast that he could barely keep up with himself. He even felt his forehead twitch, which was a sign of a headache coming up.

Gimpy had a heart attack, Milo couldn't talk to him, what was he gonna do? Gimpy could be seriously down, he could be dying right now, what was he gonna do? Did Barton or the umbrella man see Milo? What had Milo said? Was there anyone else who had known his father? Could he talk to them? Should he send Milo back? What about the old lady who'd looked at him funny?

At that last though, William looked at Milo, "Was there an old lady at the bakery?"

Milo shook his head, "No, just a young man with curly hair. Barton called him Eddy or something."

William stared at Milo in shock, "Barton was there? What did you tell him?"

Milo sniffed indignantly, "You really think I could escape KGB and not be able to hide the truth from some baker?"

William sighed, "Fine, fine. Whatever. I'll just wait before I talk to Gimpy again."

Milo shrugged, "Sorry, Willy. But let me know if I can help you again, okay?"

"Sure I will," William lied, and headed back for home after a cheerful goodbye.

He was certainly not going to use Milo for anything any time soon. Barton had recognized him, and if Barton ever talked to the umbrella man about it, then Milo would be exposed as one of William's friends. There was no point in risking that. Besides, Milo was an impossible old fool, boiled down to it.

The headache came at him now, which left William bitter, in pain, and confused on what to do next.

He thought once again of Gimpy, and that heart attack he'd had. William hoped the man was alright, and wished that he could somehow speak to him. Or at least find someone else who knew his father. Clearly the old lady wasn't there, nor was Gimpy. And poor old Mr. Donner had died long ago.

Thinking of Mr. Donner, William was suddenly reminded of the bar that Gimpy had mentioned. The Muddy Duck. Maybe he could find it and try to see if anyone knew where it was.

A pay phone stood around the corner. William began to hurry towards it, but just as he was about to get to it, another man went inside and began dialing.

Swearing in anger, William turned around on the spot and put his hands on his hips, waiting for the man to finish.

To occupy himself, William wondered what he'd ask when he called the owner of the Muddy Duck. Was he going to admit what Gimpy had told him? Was he going to pretend to be someone else? William found it annoying that big famous people in the movies always seemed to know exactly what they should say. Except Han Solo in "Star Wars", but he'd had a blaster pistol to end that awkwardness, William noted to himself.

After a minute or so, William turned around, but the man was still inside, his back turned to William, the phone glued to his ear. William could hear him talking, but didn't bother to listen in.

William turned around again, wondering if he ought to wait here for some random guy to finish his call.

Cars whizzed by, and pigeons fluttered around the concrete buildings as William waited. He felt the sun on his face as he waited for the phone to become occupied. The glare of the rays were causing pains in his head, and he began to get really annoyed, just standing out here looking like an idiot.

He turned back to look at the man in the booth, but his back was turned to William, and he was still yammering away.

William walked over to the booth and knocked on the glass, "Hey buddy, you almost finished in there?"

The man didn't even turn around, but the hand gesture he gave in response was enough of an answer for William.

Angrier than before, William grumbled insults about the man's mother under his breath as he waited for him to finish.

More than a full minute went by again before William took no more of it. He figured he'd find another pay phone close by. He turned to cross the street, but due to his bad mood and impatience at having wasted a good ten minutes on waiting for a phone, William didn't wait for the light to change before crossing.

As he stepped out onto the road, something caught his eye, and he turned to look back at the man in the phone booth. There was something very familiar about his face, but William couldn't place it. As he looked, the man turned away from William, as if he noticed William's gaze, even though William had only been looking for the merest second. It was a fatal mistake on William's part.

William suddenly heard a scream, and as he turned to look what was happening, he heard the screeches of tires, and was able to get a flashing look of the car that hit him just before the world went dark.


	12. Chapter 11

**11**

"You're lucky to be alive," Dr. Ralfolk constantly said whenever he came to check on William. In between calling him a dumb street punk, which William found unfair on his part. Any New Yorker knew that jaywalking was the only way to travel in the city.

William did find it dumb that he'd been hit be a car. And lucky? Definitely. The driver had slammed on the brakes early enough to rob the car of most of its speed. William had been hit hard, but thanks to the driver's quick reactions, he'd miraculously been spared any serious broken bones and because he'd fallen on his back, there were no serious head injuries apart from where his body and head had slammed forward onto the car's front.

Alice showed up almost immediately after William had been hit, and hadn't left the hospital ten hours later. She'd napped in the waiting room, used every second of the visiting hours, and had even helped William eat as if he was her baby all over again.

William felt bad, not just for how he had come to be in the hospital, but also for how much this had affected his mom. She looked terrible, and though she restrained herself in the hospital and his recovery, William knew he wouldn't hear the end of this one for a while.

Especially since this would cost the Kinnians a lot. The police had come by to fine William for the jaywalking, and the hospital bills were adding up. William was glad that he'd only broken three fingers on his left hand and now had a mess of bruises as well as a swelling on his left temple. The money was just small enough to not drive Alice and him out of the apartment. He definitely needed to get a job though. Maybe working for Milo wouldn't be that bad, considering it was a field he liked.

Alex and Brendan had dropped by the second day, wanting to throw Dustin Hoffman's "I'm walking here!" as many times as they could at William in his hospital bed. William couldn't help but endure it because he loved the company of his friends. And he'd loved "Midnight Cowboy" too much for any of Rizzo's lines to get old.

Eventually, William was deemed ready to leave after fifteen hours of staying in the hospital. Dr. Ralfolk came in, giving Alice all the information and the medicine that William would have to take. Alice took it all in, even agreeing that William was a dumb street punk.

William smiled at his mother, "That's right, Ma! I'm no more than a guinea punk just outta the hole!" He'd had a bit of extra medicine for his head, exaggerating his pain to the nurse earlier. It worked very well, he thought blissfully to himself.

Alice was in no mood to take a doped up joke from her street punk son, "William, you keep your mouth shut and get better so I can kill you when we get home!" She turned back to an amused Dr. Ralfolk, "Is there any more information I need to know?"

The Doctor shook his head, "Nope. Everything's been cleared up, so as soon as he's un-doped, he can leave as soon as you like."

Alice nodded, "Thank you. And I'm sorry for all the trouble he's caused."

The Doctor smiled wanly, "Don't thank me. Thank Mr. Carp. He's refused to file charges against William for the damage to his car and saved you two a hell of a lot of trouble."

Alice frowned, "Mr. Carp?"

The Doctor nodded, "Yes. Why?"

Alice paused, as if trying to remember something, but shook her head, "Never mind. Was he hurt?"

The Doctor shrugged, "He was real shaken up by it all, but he wasn't hurt. His car's good too except for the dent where your son hit it with his head. It's a good thing he wasn't doing anything with it at the time."

William burst into laughter, earning an angry look from Alice.

"""" "" """" """ """ " """ "" """ """ " "" " "" """"" """ "

Two hours later, William had gotten off the medicine, and was ready to leave. Alice was eager to get out of the hospital as soon as she could, and William knew that he'd be done for when they got back home.

Slowly, he pulled his clothes on and headed out of his room.

As he began walking down the hall, he noticed two nurses talking together outside of an open room. William overheard their conversation.

"Is Room 43 available again?"

"Yes, the family came in to say goodbye, he went peacefully."

"At least there's that. But I could have sworn he was okay when they brought him in yesterday."

William realized with a jolt that they were talking about a man who had died. He felt sickened, but also curious to hear more.

"So where are they going to bury him? Did they mention anything?"

"According to Dr. Elkin Mrs. Robertson wants to bury him at Evergreens."

"That's as good a place as any, I guess."

William suddenly felt weak. Mrs. Robertson? Evergreens Cemetery?

Gimpy was dead.

He hurried past the nurses, not wanting to hear anything else. He felt delirious; Gimpy was dead, and with him any hope of finding out more of his father and other people he might have known.

As he headed to the car, William wondered what Gimpy must have been thinking as he was dying. Was he thinking of all the wrongs he'd done in his life? Was he thinking of all the good things he'd be remembered for? Did William's father cross his mind at any point? William liked to think it, but knew it was pointless speculating on a dying man's thoughts.

He sighed and buckled his seat belt. He noted to himself that Alice was still holding in her temper.


	13. Chapter 12

**12**

"Ma, before you say anything,' William said as they entered the apartment, "I'm gonna take that job at Milo's, so that I can help pay for those bills."

He felt strangely certain about it ever since leaving the hospital. Something must have jogged him hard when he'd been hit by the car. But it suddenly made sense to go work at the movie store. William wondered what had changed about the matter, but only concluded that it made sense to go work in the store.

If Alice was pleased, she certainly didn't show it, "That's the least of my concerns! What is going on with you? You're out late, you're gone for hours at a time during the day, and now you're getting into car accidents! Is something going on that I should know?"

William shook his head automatically, but in his mind, he knew that he might very well be forced to reveal what he'd been up to these past few days. He'd never been a very good liar- he'd never needed to lie that much- and he knew that Alice would be able to see past the lie.

And of course, he turned out right. Alice frowned, and William could almost see the wheels spinning in her head as she read his response through a lie detector built into her mind. She looked him right in the eye, "Are you seeing someone right now, William?"

William almost laughed, "No, Ma!" Suddenly the tension melted away as he thought of how he'd love to be seeing someone, but he didn't have anyone particularly in mind.

Alice frowned at the sight of William's mirth in the face of what should be guilt, "Then what's keeping you so occupied?"

William shrugged, deciding to avoid looking guilty by telling the truth, "Different stuff. I've been checking out some new places that might hire me. There was the bakery, I was talking to them about what's been going on down there. Plus Milo and I were talking."

Half-truths were William's best friend. The perfect loophole where one could be vague and not be guilty of lying.

Alice was convinced. She looked at him more curiously, "You were at a bakery?"

William nodded, "Yeah, but it didn't look too interesting. I've decided to take that job at Milo's."

Alice paused, a distant look on her face, and then nodded her head, "Good. Well, let me know when you can start work."

"" "" """ """ "" "" "" "" "

Milo took the news much more jubilantly than Alice had. He clapped his hands together and leered affectionately at William in that unique way Alex so often pointed out to William.

"So! You finally want to earn your bread, eh!" he exclaimed exultantly.

William rolled his eyes, "Yeah, that would be nice."

Milo reached under the counter and pulled out a green vest like his own. The title was emblazoned on the right part of the vest. William took it, realizing that it was a perfect fit.

Milo had already begun talking to him about hours, pay, and began leading him around the store, showing him what had to be done, so that William had no chance to ask about it. How did Milo have such a vest already tailored to William's size? Crazy bugger.

Milo turned to look at William after showing him the back room and the alarm settings, "So, you want to start work right now? Or do you want to begin tomorrow?"

William almost balked at the idea of working so soon, but to his own surprise, he stated, "I can start work now. I don't have anything else important to do today."

Milo laughed, "Admirable of you, lad! You can start behind the counter while I get some lunch. Holler if you need me." With that, Milo went into the back room and closed the door behind him.

William took his place behind the counter. Despite his wonderment at his own change of heart, despite the rapid and confusing lectures from Milo, despite his surprise at his own daring, he was feeling exhilarated at the thought of being behind the counter of the store he loved most in New York. The videos were at his disposal. According to Milo, he was permitted one free movie at a time. That would save him a lot of money in the future, and it was overall a great bonus. Plus a part time job would kill time until school started again.

Thinking of spending his time, he suddenly thought of how he'd spent his time before. He thought of the umbrella man, of Barton, those men who were following him for some reason. He thought of Gimpy and Donner, the only people who seemed to remember Charlie, in their graves at Evergreens.

A sudden flash of pain went through his head. William hissed in anguish, clapping his forehead with his hand. Stupid headaches.

The door to the shop opened, and three men in their 20's came in to get a movie. William looked at them, the way they walked and spoke, and silently predicted which film they'd go for.

They went, of course, for "Rocky II". William smiled to himself as he took their money and handed them the tape. His headache still hurt, but work was turning out to be a pretty good distraction.

Next came an older woman, seeking a good film for a small get-together with her family. William asked whether there were any small children. Yes, four kids under the age of 10. William pointed her to a copy of "The Aristocats". The woman thanked William for his help and went out.

William found he had a natural idea of what films to recommend. A teenage girl wanting a romance? Sidney Pollack's "Out of Africa". An older man seeking a silly comedy? Mel Brooks' "Young Frankenstein". Young men wanting an action-packed blood-and-thunder film? Sam Peckinpah's "The Wild Bunch". Even Milo did not interfere with William's recommendations unless William asked for help. Milo could see that William was in his element. Of course, Milo was still the boss, and had many things for William to do in between recommendations.

This went on for the rest of the day. William would give recommendations, he filled out numerous purchases, and had an overall good first day. The customers didn't flood the store (William doubted that a store like Milo's had ever been filled with customers before) but the store wasn't boring either. Milo came back from his break and took over, sending William up and down the store to complete little tasks. It seemed to William that Milo was full of satisfaction and triumph at finally getting his best customer as an employee. Odd, but understandable.

It turned out that there was a lot more to handling a video store than William had thought of. There was sweeping, mopping, arranging the order of movies thrown so casually aside by careless people (William fumed at having to put cases back in their place, when he himself would have done the same thing in a heartbeat while searching for movies with Alex). There were customers to talk to, and money exchanges to be made. William began to see why Milo had wanted someone to help him run the place. It was hard work, but not too demanding in the long run.

At the end of the day, a weary William plodded towards the bus, his pocket holding an envelope of cash for a day's work, advanced by Milo as a special treat for a first day at work. He also took a free rental home for the next day.

Not bad, really, William thought to himself as he plunked down to rest as the bus began to move. Tired from his day at work, he nodded slowly off, humming to himself under his breath. Not even thinking of Gimpy or his father. Not thinking of Barton or the umbrella man. All he was thinking was that he was finally going to see Robert Redford and Bruce Dern square off in "The Great Gatsby".


	14. Chapter 13

**13**

"This video was damaged when I took it out of the case! You owe me a refund and another copy of this film."

William stood at the counter, rubbing his forehead wearily out of habit rather than pain. The odd customer that came here was a real jerk and they would damage the tapes without telling the store, so that an unnecessary moment like this happened.

An older woman in her mid forties was complaining about the damaged copy of "The Rescuers" that she'd rented. She had short blond hair that would have been going grey had she been a brunette. Wrinkles and crow's feet danced around her eyes and her perfume was more than a little strong. She could have been taken right out of "Mean Streets", or any of those classic films about New York.

Goddamnit, but this annoyed the crap out of him.

Being the boss, Milo took the issue in stride, "Madam, I will be happy to give you your refund here." The old man took a fold of dollar bills out of the cashier and put them into the woman's waiting hands.

"And my copy of the film?" The woman curled her lips in imperious demand, as if she was an empress in ancient China demanding the heads of her enemies. William shook his head at that comparison in silent mockery of his own messed up imagination.

Milo hesitated, "I'm afraid to say that I do not have another copy of this film in my store..."

The woman was incredulous, "Are you saying that your store has only one copy of a children's film? My boys want to see this film! I've been up and down all the damn stores in town, and nobody's got a damn copy!"

Suddenly a thought came to William's mind, a wonderfully evil thought that would solve the dilemna here but put the issues at someone else's door. William had seen the film too, with Alex and his sisters. One of them had suddenly needed to go to the bathroom, and so Alex had angrily paused the film to take her to the bathroom. What they hadn't seen, was a shot so surprising that William had fallen off his seat in astonishment. Before Alex and his sisters got back into the room with new snacks, William had taken the film and played it forward a few frames before pausing it again. He hadn't told anyone what he'd seen, but maybe now was the time to use it to shut this disgruntled woman up.

"If I may add, madam, the film is a tad inappropriate for your children. There is nudity in the film."

"WHAT?" Milo and the woman remarked, shocked.

"If I may say, there is a moment where the main characters are flying past these buildings and there is a naked woman in one of the windows."

The woman looked outraged, "How dare you make such shit up!"

William shrugged humbly, "I'd show you, but that would be insulting, and besides, the one copy we have is no longer working as you have pointed out."

The woman looked at Milo with suspicion, "Why didn't you know about that?"

Milo shrugged, improvising quickly, "I haven't seen the film myself, I was not told of this by the people who give me the films to distribute! I suggest you inform them."

"Fine! I will!" The woman left the store in a huff.

Milo stared at William in surprise, "Good God, how did you make that up so fast?"

William laughed, "I wasn't making it up, Milo. See for yourself when you get another copy."

"" "" "" """" """ """ """ "" """ ""

The headaches occurred less and less frequently as William's mind began focusing on his work at the video store. Before, he'd had many hours with which to fill his mind with questions on his father and his past, and he'd spent his time investigating those facts, but now he didn't even have time for a movie.

Milo, having sub-worker at last, seemed fully intent on keeping William busy. There were moments, where William would wake up early in the morning, slopping down a meagre breakfast, and he would wish hateful things on those who were making him work like this, even though he had to continue telling himself that it was his idea.

Of course, when Milo did pay him his salary, William had nothing but cheerful thoughts for the dear old fellow. It felt great to have this money to save up for later on. Alice set up a savings account for him at one of the banks in New York, and each pay day would add to the earnings.

The ironic thing to having this extra cash and the one-free rental deal was that William had very little time to enjoy these benefits. He didn't even hang out with Alex the whole week. He hadn't heard from him in ages.

"" "" "" """ """ "" "" "" "" " "" " """ ""

Milo sighed, "Well that's taken care of. I doubt she'll come back in a while though."

William shrugged, "Who cares. She wasn't a good customer anyway."

Milo frowned at the surly tone in William's voice but didn't say anything. After a week of employing this kid, he knew that William's opinion had some resonance.

William began shuffling through returned video tapes in the return bin. One of them suddenly looked very familiar.

He picked it up. He recognized it instantly, and smiled. It was a good film, one that he had seen several times.

He quoted it out loud, "Poor Raymond. Poor friendless, friendless Raymond. He was wearing his medal when he died."

"What did you say?"

William turned around, surprised by that tone of voice. Milo had gone still, staring at William with a very curious air.

"It's, from "The Manchurian Candidate". You know, that film with Frank Sinatra," William answered with a bemused tone, surprised at the level look he was given.

Milo slowly nodded, "Right... yes, of course." He snorted, "That damn Yank couldn't act his way out of a paper bag. Playing KGB assassin, eh? Pfah!"

William looked away, took the tapes out of the return bin, and began putting them away on the shelves, wondering what Milo found so strange about it all. And what was more odd was that Milo had gotten something wrong about who Frank Sinatra had played in the film. William laughed; even movie buffs made mistakes sometimes.

""" "" """ """ "" """ "" "" " "" " "" "

The rest of the day went slowly, with a few customers coming in once in a while. William was kept busy by Milo who had become far quieter now than before. Maybe he was just in a bad mood or something.

William didn't really notice. He just wanted to go home and get some sleep. He had this weekend off, though Milo had told him earlier that he may be called in to do extra shifts. William expected that even Milo must be feeling pretty guilty about that, even though William would be earning more.

It was finally the end of the shift though. William headed over to the counter and handed his keys over to Milo, "Well, hope you have a good weekend."

Milo nodded, "You're not taking any videos with you?" He sounded surprisingly neutral, as if he was waiting for what kind of answer William would give.

It actually hadn't occurred to William to take a video, but he suddenly felt annoyed. The old sourpuss just had to be a stick in the mud? Well screw him then. William knew which film he wanted to get. For some reason he wanted to bug Milo. And he remembered the scornful remarks he'd made of Frank Sinatra's wonderful performance in a great film, so he went to the mystery section and got the film tape out.

Heading back to the counter, William handed Milo the tape and smiled evilly, "But now, we have come almost to the end. One last step. And then when I take power, they will be pulled down and ground into dirt for what they did to you. And what they did in so contemptuously underestimating me."

A flash went through Milo's eyes- fear, it was fear, William thought- and in another half-whisper, he called out, "What was that?"

William's smile faded a little, "It's just the movie quote!" He raised a mocking eyebrow, "You feeling okay, Milo? You should get some rest this weekend."

Milo nodded slowly, "Sure. Yeah I think I will... You go on now, Will. Goodbye." He sounded bitter; still annoyed about that movie thing, William thought. Communists must treat "Manchurian Candidate" like garlic or something!

William headed out. On Fridays, the store closed at its latest for some reason. As if anyone was going to come rushing in to get a movie at this time. William's watch read 11:12 PM. Great. Another late night to have to sneak into the house.

At least there weren't many people on the sidewalk. William headed down the block to wait for the bus.

The bus was set to come in fifteen minutes, William noticed from the board. He just needed to kill time.

To amuse himself, William began singing songs under his breath for the kick of it. He knew some of the new ones being played on the radio these days, and since nobody seemed to be around to notice, William kept going.

He checked his watch again. 11:29 PM. A minute more. William resumed his rendition of Billy Joel's hilarious take on changing music.

_What's the matter with the car I'm driving?_  
_ Can't you tell that it's out of style?_  
_ Should I get a set of white wall tires?_  
_ Are you gonna cruise the miracle mile?_  
_ Nowadays you can't be too sentimental_  
_ Your best bet's a true baby blue Continental._  
_ Hot funk, cool punk, even if it's old junk_  
_ It's still rock and roll to me._

William mimed a drum set being used before continuing,

_ Oh, it doesn't matter what they say in the papers_  
_ 'Cause it's always been the same old scene._  
_ There's a new band in town_  
_ But you can't get the sound from a story in a magazine..._

William would have gone on, but a fist suddenly slugged him right in the stomach.

William gasped for air, bending forward over the impact.

A pair of hands grabbed his shoulders and pulled him upright, and through watery eyes, William saw a large figure standing in front of him, with a kind of mask that bank robbers and winter walkers wore all the time. The man drew his fist back for another punch. William gasped again, trying to scream.

He couldn't even move away as the fist crashed into the side of his face. It hurt even worse than he imagined it would, and he barely had enough air in his lungs to yelp out in a pathetic gesture of pain. The right side of his face felt like it was on fire, while the pain in his stomach had made his legs weak.

"Just finish it," a dark whisper came from the guy standing behind William, "Slit the son of a bitch's throat!"

"No, wait!" William managed to moan, "I got money! Take it, please!"

The man in front of him had already pulled out an old switchblade, "Oh yeah? Is that right? And what we supposed to do when you report us to the police?"

William stared at the knife, shaking. He felt something near his eye swelling up and he knew the tears pouring down his face weren't just from the pain. He was terrified, so scared...

Suddenly a flash of light shone in his face, and he had to close his eyes because of it.

The man holding him suddenly swore loudly. The knife holder turned around in surprise.

William opened his eyes again, and realized it was the bus, just starting to pull in.

William didn't want to wait for it to get there. He had seen the knife, and he knew these two had no qualms over killing him. He got up and hurried off, running as fast as the pain in his gut allowed him to.

The shock and adrenaline however seemed like cold water shooting through a faucet as William hurried past closed up buildings. He could hear the heavy footsteps behind him, and the curses of those men trying to keep up with him.

With his last breath he screamed at last, a piercing cry in the night, "HELP! HELP!"

He wanted to collapse, his arteries and veins seeming to pump acid now. His body was screaming for him to lie down, but he knew he was a dead man if he didn't keep going.

In the corner of his eye he saw lights in upper floors go up, and heard a woman scream as she looked outside her window.

"POLICE!" went the call down the street, and as he turned another corner, William heard the footsteps lessen, maybe because the two punks were wondering if it was worth chasing this one victim. William didn't even stop; he just kept running.

Finally he couldn't hear their steps anymore. He forced himself onward, but he chanced a look behind him. His breathing coming out like an old elephant's, he whipped his head around to see if they were still there.

No one.

William wanted to sob with relief when he felt himself trip. As he turned back around, he fell against the hard pavement; right on the same side of his face that had just been punched.

Pain shot through his body again, and William wondered if he'd die from this. He tasted blood in his mouth as he tried to get up. His legs buckled and he just lay on the sidewalk, taking in oxygen even as he whimpered feebly.

"Hey kid! Are you okay?" A shocked voice cried out.

William looked up to see who it was, and even in this moment of panic, fear, and shame, he recognized the person in front of him from that one day not too long before, which now seemed like ten years ago in a whole different city.


	15. Chapter 14

**14**

"Jesus Christ!" The woman said as she rushed to his side.

William groaned, because that was the only sound he could manage at the moment. But he recognized this woman. The one who had worn her blond hair so attractively, yet the hairstyle had seemed meant for a younger woman than she was. Looking at her now, he could see that she was probably in her forties. Her clothes looked really odd. Inviting, attempting to be seductive. William suddenly wondered what her occupation was.

She was pulling a handkerchief from her purse to mop up some blood that had trickled from his mouth onto his face, "What happened to you, kid?"

William spat a mouthful of blood out and spoke, "Got mugged..." He winced with pain, as his gut acted up from his stretching his arm.

She pulled him up to his feet anyway, "Come on, let's get you out of here. My place isn't far."

With William putting most of his weight onto her, the two of them staggered up the stairs and through the door, after a fumbling of keys on the woman's part.

The apartment looked unclean, and paint and wallpaper was peeling off in many parts of the hall. William noticed that the room was a bit blurry. Had he gotten a concussion?

The woman steered him down the hall, until eventually she stopped at the farthest door down on the right side. Another fumbling of her keys, and she opened the door, still supporting William.

After she flicked the lights on, William got a look at the room. It was in little better condition than the hall outside. Peeling and stained wallpaper, tape on the ceiling. Old furniture was scattered around the place, with a big amount of space given up to a series of paintings and and blank canvases. Paint buckets were standing around on wrinkled newspapers. Paint brushes were placed around at odd intervals.

William's attention was suddenly broken by the woman's voice, "Jesus, you're hurt real bad. I'm gonna get you a cloth or something. Here, lie down here..."

He felt his legs give way, and he felt the hard pillows on the couch break his collapse. He closed his eyes, listening to the footsteps walking away from him. A sink was turned on, then turned off... a cold wet cloth was put on his face...

A sudden gasp of horror from the woman shook William out of his stupor. He opened his eyes in alarm, and looked around from where he was lying down. The woman was standing stock still, her eyes wide with shock, her mouth open. The cloth she'd been using was on the floor, completely forgotten.

Slowly, William raised himself up on the support of his elbows, "What's wrong?" He heard a panic in his voice, but he couldn't help it. He had just been attacked, threatened with murder, and was in this strange woman's apartment room, and he may or may not have had a concussion.

The woman just stood there, almost trembling, then asked in a hushed whisper, "What's your name?"

William suddenly had a suspicion on what it was, "Will. William Kinnian."

The woman collapsed in a nearby chair, still staring at William, "Is your father Charlie Gordon?"

William nodded, "Yes he was."

"Was?"

"I've never met him, but my mother's Alice Kinnian if that helps. Did you know her too?"

"Oh my fucking God... You really are his son then..."

Remembering the fact that he had had been attacked, the woman gave William the cloth back to use on his face. William dabbed it over his injuries, noticing how soothing the feel of the cold cloth actually was.

"I'll get us something to eat," said the woman, and she quickly went into the kitchen.

As William held the cloth to his face, he looked around at the room, taking in its details. There were many paintings on the wall, he noticed, so many that they almost seemed like wall paper. There were scores of other canvases lying around, some painted on, others still blank. Empty bottles lay scattered around in between the canvases, like a herd of zebras had merged with a herd of wildebeests on the Savannah. Several of the paintings looked to be self-portraits, and one painting hanging on the wall particularly drew William's attention. It was a half length of the woman, but she looked so much younger in that one. Clearly she'd been painting for years, and as strange as it would have seemed in the circumstances, William felt aroused as he took in the details of the face, the hair braided long, her up-turned breasts with their red-coloured nipples...

"I know it's not much, I'm getting groceries tomorrow, but hopefully it'll help," said the woman, now back in the room. She was holding a plate with some hastily prepared sandwiches, and she was also holding a bottle of beer for herself. William quickly looked back at the woman, hoping he didn't look strange.

He suddenly wanted to smile at that thought. Of _course_ he looked strange! But he didn't say anything except to thank the woman for the food.

As they ate, William looked back at this woman, wondering about how his father had met her. He was also feeling a headache rising up, but tried not to think about it as he wondered how this woman knew about Charlie. Had she known him? Did she know what had happened to him? How he'd gotten smart?

"Who are you?" William asked, pausing to flinch from the headache. It wasn't like the pain from his injuries, which he'd been noticing the whole time as well, but those usual pains that occurred in his head per usual. He wondered why it had picked now to happen.

The woman, who thanks to the beer had recovered a bit of her colour, slowly answered, "My name's Fay Lillman. I lived on the same floor as your dad for a bit. That was a long time ago though..." As she said those last eight words, she begun to look very sad, as if reminiscing on how things were so good back then. William wasn't sure, and he didn't really care at that moment.

"What was he like?" He asked.

Fay sighed, "He was... God I haven't thought about him for years... He was such a square." At that final sentence Fay burst into unexpected laughter.

William raised an eyebrow, "What?"

Quickly getting over her fit, Fay explained, "It's just the first time I met him he was... well, just kind of weird. Well, that's not a good way to... See, he was just kind of awkward. He was really nervous and shy when he met me. Though I guess it would have made sense 'cause I can't remember if I was wearing clothes at the time..."

William remembered the self portrait and for the first time in his life, he envied his father.

Fay continued in her disjointed memories of the past, "Well see, he'd just moved in and he was locked out of his apartment so he needed to use my fire escape. He was really polite and I thought he must have graduated from some fancy school because he had that way of talking you could say. Anyways, he was a sweetie really. Loaned me money when I needed it, and excuse me for saying it, but he looked great."

William suddenly found it a bit amusing at how this conversation was turning, but he didn't say anything. He wanted to keep hearing this.

"So anyway..." said Fay, now hesitating. She looked at William in an odd way, as if she were suddenly awkward, but she decided he could take it, so she continued, "...so me and your dad had a bit of a fling going there."

William's eyebrows raised in surprise, "But... was this before he met my mom or was it...?"

Fay waved her hand in dismissal, "Well it was complicated, he never went into detail on it, but I met her once and she sort of explained it. They went out a few times and she called it quits." A thoughtful look came onto Fay's face, "Come to think of it, they got back together after he and I stopped seeing each other..." Her face fell as she stayed silent.

William was almost maddened by curiosity and thirst for information. What did all this mean? Why did Alice break it off with Charlie? When had they gotten together? How had they met? William didn't know whether it was these questions, or the increased headache that made him want to scream, but it took a lot of nerve to keep him from screaming in front of Fay.

Instead, he spoke up, "Please, tell me... what was so strange about him?"

Fay frowned, "You don't know _any _of this?"

"No. My mom never talks about it."

"Poor woman," Fay mused, "I don't know if you should be hearing this from me. Your father only knew me for a little bit, I can't..."

"Just tell me what you know!" William suddenly pleaded, interrupting her.

Fay blinked in surprise at this sudden outburst, and then sighed resignedly, "Give me a minute."

William wondered what she meant, but then she took a long drink from her beer bottle. He wondered why she needed to nerve herself even more. What was coming up? What was he about to find out?

Fay smacked her lips in appreciation of the beer, and looked at William, "Right. I'll tell you what I know. But promise me not to judge your father on what I've got to say."

William nodded quickly, and waited for her to continue.


	16. Chapter 15

**15**

"Your father was a really smart guy," said Fay, "but also a really odd guy as well. I'd heard this new guy named Charlie Gordon had come in to visit, but I didn't meet him at first. See, one night, I came back from some dancing- I loved to go to dance halls back then, still do when I find the time- and I had just driven this one creep out of my apartment room. So I go over to Charlie's place, and I... well we flirted a bit, let's just say that. But then after a few drinks he went all weird and silly."

"What?" William interrupted.

"Weird. You know, odd and all that. Like say when a grown man starts acting like a little boy. He went on about God knows what- I can't remember- but he was acting really strange. Like he had two sides to him. And his drunk side was a retard."

William flinched at Fay's last comment, but she hadn't noticed due to her taking another drink.

"So that's just what I noticed. I thought maybe he just couldn't hold his liquor- Jesus, I've seen it happen so many times- and I liked him, but that was really disappointing for me. That one night. But then a while after that he came back and he just was all up for it. That's when our fling started. He was a real sweet guy to be honest, gotta give him credit. But he was always busy with his work. He kept talking about all this cockamammy bull shit that I just couldn't care about. God knows I couldn't understand what he was saying then, let alone remember it all now. After he quit dancing it got worse, 'cause that meant I had to hoof it alone surrounded by great dancers who were also creeps. And then I met Alice."

William perked up, "Yeah?"

Fay shrugged, a bitter look coming onto her face, "Nice woman, I could tell she loved Charlie. No matter what she said about her breaking it off with him and all that. I started wondering if there was still something Charlie had for her. He had this look on his face sometimes when we were together. I didn't know what it was at that point, but... well, since then I've seen that look so many times over the years, and it's a look a man gets when he's thinking of the woman he really loves. He's there with you, but his thoughts are somewhere else, remembering that girl who drove him to the moon and back. For Charlie, that girl was Alice."

As sorry as he suddenly felt for Fay as she spoke about this, William couldn't help but feel happy that his parents truly loved one another, even when they weren't together. When he had been a child, he had once heard a story about a man who had run away from his family and married someone else. Had Charlie done that too? Had he left his wife and son? William later on got some small facts from Alice, and it was enough to quell such a childhood fear, but hearing it confirmed for good was a bigger relief than he'd anticipated.

Fay suddenly continued on, "After that I got different boyfriends, I moved on. But for Charlie... well... things got really weird. He started picking fights with some of the neighbours about music and other stuff. He was either locked up in his room, or he was away somewhere else. Nobody ever knew. Not that we got together and gossipped a lot anyway, but you get the idea. Then Alice moved in with him."

William was surprised, "What?"

Fay nodded, "Yeah. She called me and asked me how Charlie was doing, and when I told her, she came by and asked to get in his room using the fire exit through my room. I heard Charlie come back late that night and they had a long chat. I don't know what they said, but it seemed all good at first."

"How long did they stay together?" asked William.

Fay sighed, "Well kid, I'd love to tell you they lived happily ever after but you know they didn't. She and he started arguing. I could hear shouting from my room one day, and that same day she packed up and left. About ten days after she first showed up."

William's heart sank in his chest. Only ten days? Just ten days of love and compassion between his parents?

"What happened to Charlie after that?" asked William resignedly.

Fay shuddered as she spoke, "He really broke down. God damn but it was scary. I even put a new lock on my door and told him to never speak to me again. People came to see him. Alice tried to drop by, some doctor fellow I think, and the landlady started having arguments with him about whether he was being a loafer or if he was sick. She brought some doctor to see him, but he chased them out and slammed the door on them. It really got bad for him in the end."

"Did... did he die or something?" William asked.

"I have no clue,' Fay remarked, 'I do know that he just left the apartment one day. A few people came to help him pack up and leave. I managed to get a quick peak of him before he left. He looked so different than when I'd known him. All the intellect was gone from his face. It was like when he'd first gotten drunk, before he'd been able to tolerate the alcohol. It scared the shit out of me at the time, but I never saw him again. And I haven't thought about him for years. Until I realized how much you look like him."

William felt a flush of pride at Fay's last words, but his mind was still in a whirl. He had known from Gimpy that Charlie had been retarded, so hearing it from Fay was no surprise. It was more of a confirmation. It explained a lot, but not nearly enough for William to be satisfied. It was clear that Fay couldn't help him any further than she did.

"Do you want to see him?" Fay suddenly asked.

William's head snapped back to Fay, shocked. "What?"

"Oh, shit." Fay cursed, "Sorry. I meant, do you want to see what he looked like. I painted his portrait a few times back then. He only posed once for me, but replicating the painting in other poses was easy enough after that first painting."

William looked at the collections of paintings, watched as Fay pored over them before picking one and giving it to him.

It was a portrait from the waist up of a man in his mid thirties. He was looking straight out at William, and William suddenly felt like he was looking at a real person. The dark eyes of of the young man radiated intelligence and a guarded wariness. The smile seemed a bit forced onto his mouth, as though he was unsure of what he was doing, standing there in front of Fay's easel. William stared intently at all the features that Fay had gotten in. Every wrinkle on his face, every strand of hair that was stiffly combed into that 60's style that the straight-arrow people had worn instead of the hippie fashions. His clothes looked really good quality, and his posture was straight and very formal.

William suddenly felt his headache start to throb worse, but he quickly forgot, because he'd begun to cry. Not because he'd been mugged or because his head hurt. It was because he finally had a picture of his father in front of him. He could now put a face to name, the name he'd never even acknowledged. Charlie Gordon.

William felt an arm go around him, comforting him. He heard Fay give soothing words, but he didn't listen. All he focused on was the face of Charlie Gordon, which he could now see truly was a lot like his own.

In a way, William had found his father. The realization was a feeling like nothing else could equal to.


	17. Chapter 16

**16**

When William woke up the next morning, he forgot where he was.

He was lying on a strange couch in a room littered with paintings. Sitting up suddenly, he wondered with alarm how he got here, before remembering what had final communications with Milo, those two freaks that tried to kill him, meeting Fay...

Even as he thought of this, he looked around the room. His eyes fell upon the painting of Charlie that he had spent the night before sobbing over. He remembered falling asleep on Fay's couch and Fay leaving to her bedroom.

William stared longer at the painting, striving to put every detail to memory. He knew it was a painting, not a photograph, but Fay had done a great job making it look life-like. Just as he'd done the night before, William felt like the painting was looking at him.

"'Morning."

He whirled around where he sat. Fay had come in, dressed in a bathrobe that had used to be maroon-coloured, but had since lost most of its colour. Her hair hung loose around her shoulders, and her face, without any make-up, showed her age. Despite this, William couldn't help but see how attractive she must have been when younger, and he suddenly remembered that his father had fallen for this woman, and his attraction to her vanished, replaced with more of an awkwardness towards that thought.

"You feeling better, Will?" Fay asked.

William nodded, "Do I look any better?"

Fay smiled, "A bit. But honey, the shit you got involved in last night won't go away like in the movies."

William rolled his eyes, "I wish..."

Fay pointed towards one of the doors branching off from the main room, "You wanna get cleaned up a bit more?"

"Sure. Thanks." William got up and headed for the bathroom.

It was a narrow room with the bare necessities. It wasn't as good as the one in William's apartment, but this was New York, and William didn't complain.

He turned on the light and studied his face in the mirror. The swelling on the right side of his face had decreased a bit as the night had gone on, but the bruises were still very dark against his pale skin. Had he broken any bones in his cheek? He remembered how Michael Corleone had been punched on that side of the face and had needed surgery to fix it. Was the same thing wrong with him? William couldn't tell at the moment, but he hoped he wouldn't have to see another doctor after having so soon come back from the hospital.

Think of his stint in the hospital made him remember Gimpy's death. The man had told him so much about his father, and yet had left so many questions. Thinking of all this while he dabbed at his face with soapy hands, William suddenly felt a surge of pain in his head, more headaches just when he needed them.

Trying to ignore it, William remembered the scene where Gimpy had shown him Arthur Donner's grave. Donner, the man who had been so kind to Charlie all his life... How had he died? Car crash... driving back from his favourite bar, William recalled. He gritted as the pains got worse, now rinsing his face with cold water.

He thought of the attack the night before. The genuine fear of death as the one attacker urged the other to kill him. Why would they murder him for just some money?

The thoughts kept circling in his mind, like a dog chasing its tail. He couldn't grasp it, but something seemed very wrong with this whole situation. Two random thugs grab him and prepare to slit his throat by the bus stop? Who in their right mind would risk that scene just for the possibility of cash? 'To be fair,' William thought to himself, 'New York has a lot of strange people in the streets at night. Who knows what a pair of crazy, drug-addicted freaks would do?'

And the sheer chance of it happening to William... having just come out of work and all. Thinking ruefully of how he'd just been singing a Billy Joel song to himself, William was probably asking for it for being so careless.

He suddenly started stepping back in time, retracing his steps before the attack. As if there was any point in it at all...

Suddenly, he started thinking of those last few moments with Milo. How he had looked at William before William had left. What had William done? He had quoted a line from "The Manchurian Candidate" at Milo. And Milo had acted downright creeped out. Scared almost. Why? What did Milo have to worry about?

William thought of the line he had said. It was a line where the movie's twist had been revealed. That the mother was controlling the son through his mind. And his mother was swearing vengeance against the people that had underestimated and used her in turn. Had it conveyed some message to Milo that William had been unaware of?

The more he thought of it, the less sense it made. Milo wouldn't have been freaked out over a quote. He threw quotes at William every other week. It had been that quote specifically. Or was it just that movie in general?

A movie about a man being manipulated by the people closest to him... William suddenly felt chilled, and as he gazed at his reaction in the mirror, the look on his face started to scare him even more. He looked away and tried to keep thinking.

Was Milo using him for something? Was that always why he had suggested William find a job in his store? What would he have to hide from William? It had to be something big. The fact that William had quoted that quote from that particular movie must have implied a knowledge that he didn't have. And Milo had panicked because he'd though William knew something. But what?

William went over in head all the moments that he had seen Milo and anything that seemed odd. He thought of his conversations with the clerk and with Alex. He thought of the movie rentals, the movie debates, the mentoring over how to work the store, sending him to spy on the bakery, seeing him talk to the umbrella man...

Suddenly William remembered how when he'd left Milo's to see the bakery, he'd noticed the umbrella man for the first time. When he'd gone to the bakery again and had met Gimpy, he'd gone immediately to Milo about it... when he'd left Milo's to go to the pay phone, someone had been occupying the phone for the longest time, hiding his face from William... and that had been after Milo had gone to Barton as a spy. He had taken a long time then, hadn't he?

William felt jolts of pure shock shoot through his body. Milo was with Barton and the umbrella man! Milo had been spying on him all along! For Christ knows how long! And he had arranged a hit on William when he thought William was onto him. At the thought of this horrible idea, William felt physically sick, lunging for the toilet to vomit.

He felt tears well up as the acid burned his throat, but also out of pure shock at this closest betrayal. What had Milo told them? Why was Milo in league with these men? What did they want from him? What was the reason for all this?

And the thoughts got worse, for William suddenly remembered the old lady who'd shown some kind of recognition. He'd never seen her again. Was she... William vomited again.

And Gimpy? Had they spied on his meeting with Gimpy? Had they taken care of him somehow in the hospital? William felt another heave at his stomach, but he had nothing else to vomit out, which left him retching into a toilet bowl already gagging him with the smell.

Above it all, he was mad with shock and rage. He wanted to scream, smash the furniture, do or say _something_. Instead, he continued to shudder and feel sick.

What was going to happen now? He was still alive. Milo, Barton, and the umbrella man knew he was onto them, and he finally _was_ aware of them now.

But was he aware? Was he sure of this, or was he just crazy?

William almost hoped he was making mistakes, but this seemed to coincidental to be false. How else could all this be explained?

Suddenly there was a sharp knocking on the bathroom door, "William! Are you okay in there?"

Blinking past tears and trying breathe normally again, William gasped, "No. I'm not. I have no fucking idea what I'm going to do now."


	18. Chapter 17

**17**

Fay looked concerned as William stepped out of the bathroom, "What's the matter?"

William didn't know what to say. Could he trust this woman? Sure, she knew his dad when he was alive, but maybe she, just like Milo all those years, was trying to win him over. Thinking of Milo made Williams fists shake with rage.

Fay suddenly put her hand on his cheek, staring into his eyes, "You look like you're about to faint, William! What's wrong?"

"I have to go home... no, I can't... they know where I live..." William tried to speak sense, but the overwhelming realization of how deep this conspiracy had gone seemed to have driven him into shock.

Fay turned and picked up the phone, "I'm callin' the cops. This is going too far!"

William felt a sudden jolt of fear. Not the cops. They would never believe him. Maybe they'd even think that he was crazy like his dad had been and lock him up. And then who knew what would happen!

William turned and ran for the door, ignoring Fay's cry of protest. He threw himself out of the building, cursing as his injuries from the night before slowed him down with waves of pain through his body.

Still, he pushed himself onward. He had to get out of here. But who could he trust?

His mother? He couldn't contact her, she'd never believe all this. Alex? What could he do? Gimpy was dead, and Fay was no help to him now. William felt despair closing in on him from every direction. He knew that he had to run, but where would he go? And how did he know that they weren't watching him? Who was a friend and who was an enemy?

William stopped running, tears flowing down his face. All this because of what? Why was this happening to him? Was it his father? Had his father done something to earn this suspicion and spying?

For the first time in his life, William cursed his father's memory, wishing that things could be the way things used to be. He wanted to go back to watching movies with Alex in the afternoons, playing pool at Big Bob's, getting ready for school. Why couldn't it be so simple again?

He sat down and tried to think rationally. All this whining and crying was getting him nowhere. William had a feeling that the cops wouldn't be in a hurry to pick him up, even if Fay insisted on it, but even when they did show up, he had already gone four blocks.

Where could he go? His home wasn't safe anymore. Neither was Alex's. Milo knew a lot about them, and he'd use that info to predict where William would go.

But what would Milo do if William didn't go back? Would he try to give William a reason to go back?

Of course, William thought with horror. They'd either kidnap Alex or his mother to force him to give up. But what did they have in mind? All they'd done was follow him around, keeping tabs on him. Where was it all going to go?

William decided that he had to get his mother out of their home. He knew that she had the next couple of days off, so she'd be there to pick up the phone.

William began running from street to street, looking for a payphone he could use. He didn't have to look far to find one, and he quickly dialed his home number.

"Hello?"

William paused, listening to his mother's answer of the phone. She sounded worried, tired. William remembered that he had stayed away from home all night. He suddenly felt horribly guilty for not having called earlier.

"Mom, it's me."

"William!" Alice almost shrieked into the phone, "Oh my God, where the hell have you been?!"

"Mom, I was mugged last night!" William yelled back, trying to speak before she started to lecture him or something.

"You what? What happened?" Alice's voice lost all hostility.

"I was waiting for the bus and some goons jumped me. I got away alright and I stayed over at someone's place for the night."

"Why didn't you call!?" Alice suddenly asked, her voice biting with anger. William was suddenly very glad that this was a phone conversation.

"Mom, look, I think I might be in bigger trouble than I thought. I'll explain everything, but I need you to come meet me. I don't wanna talk at home."

"Why not? What's wrong? What's this trouble you're talking about?"

"Mom," William said wearily, "Just please listen and do this for me, okay? Meet me at Parsons Blvd and Archer Avenue." It was where the Archer Avenue subway line ended in Queens. The line was very new, only just recently finished.

There was another brief silence before William heard Alice respond, "Okay, I'll be there."

"And Mom. Make sure you're not followed. I know it sounds crazy, but I really honestly think something strange is going on." William wished he didn't have to say that, but after everything he had gone through in the last while or so, he had to take precautions.

Strangely, Alice didn't question it. All she said was, "I understand. I'll see you soon." William heard a click on the other end.

He sighed heavily, wondering why Alice had taken that last sentence so well. Wait, he suddenly thought, maybe she just thinks I've gone crazy or something and she's gonna come meet me with cops.

No, not her. Alice wouldn't do that to her own kid. William cursed at himself for being so suspicious about everything. It was his mom for God's sake!"

Whatever, he suddenly thought. I'll just go. I'm sick of all this running around with strange guys following me. I'm going to find out what's going on, and I'm going to find out if I can trust Mom to believe me.

But what if she brings the cops and the doctors to seal him up in a looney bin, he thought to himself.

Reluctantly, he decided that he would take that risk. If his mom was gonna do that to him, then he wouldn't care. He was going to go meet Alice, because if he couldn't trust her, he couldn't trust anyone, and he would rather spend his days locked up than live like this.


End file.
